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Inspirational thought of the week:

Now that I put it all together, oh oh
Give me the chance to make you see
Have you used up all the love in your heart?
Nothing left for me?
Ain’t there nothing left for me?

Baby come back,
Any kind of fool could see
I was wrong and I just can’t live without you

“Baby Come Back,” Player

Here at Bottom 10 Headquarters, located down the hallway from the medical facility where scientists are studying Pat McAfee’s blood because they believe it might contain enough electricity to power entire cities, we are basking in the warm glow of a different kind of positive energy. The kind of warmth and super-inflated ego that can come only with recognition on TV.

For years we have wondered aloud, tongue-in-cheek, what it would be like if the folks at College GameDay ever allowed themselves to join forces with us here at Bottom 10 GameDuh. No one ever understood us because deep down we all knew it would never happen. Also, have you ever tried talking with your tongue jammed into your cheek?

Then came last Saturday at the home of the Artists Formerly Known as the Nayhawks.

It was so good to see our people hadn’t forgotten us, even if they were trying to say goodbye. But that afternoon, as Kansas fell short in the closing seconds against TCU and the Rock Chalk fans finally emerged from their surrender cobras, there we were again, standing behind the end zone with a Willem Dafoe GIF look in our eyes and a cackle set to that “N-nuh n-nuh n-nunh-nuh” song when the Wicked Witch rides the bike in “The Wizard of Oz.” Because you can never forget your first true love. Especially when that first true love keeps following you to class and sliding into your DMs. And yeah, Kansas, that’s us, just in time for Halloween.

With apologies to Gayle Sayers, my old college girlfriend and Steve Harvey, here are the post-Week 6 Bottom 10 rankings.

1. Colora-duh (0-5)

The good news? The Buffs didn’t lose this week. The bad news? It’s because they didn’t play. The worse news? When the team got together for breakfast during its off weekend, the Buffs ran out of butter and jelly, which meant they still failed to cover the spread.

2. Huh-Why?-Yuh (1-5)

Speaking of covering spreads, Hawai’i went to San Diego State as a 24-point underdog but lost by only two. Now the Rainbow Warriors embark on a schedule that might very well be the road to a Bottom 10 title, if by “road” you mean a waterslide where the water has been replaced with WD-40. That thrill ride begins with a trip two weeks from now to second-ranked-turned-Waiting-Lister Colora-duh State, and then two weeks after that with an ocean hop over to …

3. Fres-No State (1-5)

Speaking of two-week increments, just two weeks ago the Bullfrogs weren’t even in these rankings. Now they have spent the past two weeks in the top half of them. That’s what happens when you lose to UCan’t after kicking off as a 23-point favorite, then lose to Boise State when it’s 20-20 in the third quarter and you proceed to surrender 20 unanswered points. Plus, there was a very natural segue to go from Hawai’i to Fresno and I am way too lazy to CTL+C them anywhere else in the standings.

4. UMess (1-5)

The Minutemen lost to Liberty. Speaking of CTL+C, copy that sentence into an email and send it your least favorite history teacher just to watch their head explode.

5. BOO!-mer Sooner (3-3)

Now for sale on the State Fair of Texas midway: deep-fried Schooners.

6. Akronmonious (1-5)

Over the past two weekends, the once-packed MAC faction of one-win teams has been cut in half, from six to three. That roster is guaranteed to be shortened by at least one again this week when the Zips host Not Eastern Or Western But Central Michigan in the Pillow Fight of the Week Episode VI: The MACtion Menace. If the Zips lose this one, then all of this feels like one big countdown to the final weekend of the season, when Akron hosts the other current one-win MAC team, Northern Ill-ugh-noise.

7. Boiling Green (2-4)

But … wait … if there are two other one-win MAC teams not in these rankings, then how can we justify having a two-win MAC team ranked above/below them? Two words: Extra. Effort.

8. North by Northworstern (1-5)

You might assume the Mildcats would have a fighting chance this weekend against Iowa, a team that never scores actual touchdowns, but keep in mind Northwestern just lost 42-7 to Wisconsin, a team that doesn’t have an actual head coach.

9. Charlotte 1-and-5ers

Speaking of head coaches, a heads-up to Charlotte administrators. If someone starts knocking on your office door, saying, “Candygram,” it’s probably Matt Rhule from down the street.

10. Whew Mexico State (1-5)

The Other Aggies host the Only Lobos in the 112th edition of the game known as the Battle of I-25, named for the highway that connects Las Cruces to Albuquerque. When this game was first played in 1894, it was called the Battle of Oh Damn Our QB Just Got Bit By A Rattlesnake On The Trail.

Waiting list: Colora-duh State, Michigan State Sparse-uns, CMU Chippendales, Northern Ill-ugh-noise, US(not C)F, Strandford, FI(notA)U, Temple of Doom, Livin’ on Tulsa Time, the Mets.

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L.A.’s Glasnow joins Snell on IL with similar injury

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L.A.'s Glasnow joins Snell on IL with similar injury

LOS ANGELES — Tyler Glasnow was put on the injured list Monday with what the Los Angeles Dodgers described as shoulder inflammation, joining fellow frontline starter Blake Snell, who has been sidelined by a similar injury.

Dodgers manager Dave Roberts said Glasnow’s right shoulder is structurally sound but is also dealing with what Roberts called “overall body soreness.”

Glasnow gave up back-to-back homers in Sunday’s first inning against the Pittsburgh Pirates, then was removed from the game after experiencing discomfort while warming up for the second. Afterward, Glasnow expressed frustration at his constant string of injuries and speculated that his latest ailment might stem from the mechanical adjustments he made to improve the health of his elbow.

Glasnow sat out the 2½ months of last season — including the playoffs — with what was initially diagnosed as an elbow sprain, a big reason why the Dodgers were relegated to only three starting pitchers in their march toward a World Series title. Now, he is one of eight starting pitchers on the Dodgers’ injured list.

One of those arms, Tony Gonsolin, will be activated Wednesday to make his first major league start in 20 months. But the Dodgers are short enough on pitching that they’ll have to stage a bullpen game the day before.

“Pitching is certainly volatile,” said Roberts, who added journeyman right-hander Noah Davis to the roster in Glasnow’s place. “We experienced it last year and essentially every year. I think the thing that’s probably most disconcerting is the bullpen leading Major League Baseball in innings. When you’re talking about the long season, the starters are built up to go take those innings down. That’s sort of where my head is at as far as trying to make sure we don’t redline these guys in the pen.”

Dodgers relievers entered Monday’s series opener against the Miami Marlins having accumulated 121⅓ innings, 7⅔ more than the Chicago White Sox, who are already on a 122-loss pace.

Glasnow and Snell aren’t expected to be out for a prolonged period, but their timetables are uncertain. Clayton Kershaw could return before the end of May, but Shohei Ohtani might not serve as a two-way player until after the All-Star break. Yoshinobu Yamamoto and Roki Sasaki could temporarily assume a traditional five-day schedule, as opposed to the once-a-week routine they’ve been following, but the Dodgers have only four starting pitchers on their active roster.

Glasnow, 31, is in his 10th year in the big leagues but has never compiled more than 134 innings in a season, a mark he set last year. The Dodgers acquired him from the Tampa Bay Rays and subsequently signed him to a five-year, $136.56 million extension in December 2023 with the thought that his injury issues might be behind him.

“Tyler said it — very frustrating,” Roberts said. We’re just trying to get to the bottom of it.”

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Altuve asks out of Astros’ top spot, then homers

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Altuve asks out of Astros' top spot, then homers

HOUSTON — Jose Altuve asked manager Joe Espada to move him out of the leadoff spot and into the second hole for the Houston Astros. The reason? He wanted more time to get to the dugout from left field.

Altuve hit a two-run homer in the Astros’ 8-5 win over the Detroit Tigers on Monday while playing left in 2025 for the first time in his career after spending his first 14 MLB seasons at second base. “I just need like 10 more seconds,” he said.

The 34-year-old Altuve made the transition to the outfield this season after the trade of Kyle Tucker and the departure of Alex Bregman shook up Houston’s lineup.

Jeremy Peña batted in the leadoff spot for Monday night’s game and went 2-for-4 with two runs scored. Altuve didn’t suggest that Peña be the one to take his leadoff spot, and on Monday, he had two hits and three RBIs while batting second for the first time since 2023.

“I just told Joe that maybe he can hit me second some games at some point, and he did it today,” Altuve said. “I just need like that little extra time to come from left field, and he decided to put Jeremy [there].”

Peña is hitting .265 with three homers and 11 RBIs. He batted first in Sunday’s 7-3 win over Kansas City — with Altuve getting a day off — and had two hits and three RBIs. He added two more hits and scored twice Monday.

“I enjoy playing baseball,” Altuve said. “I love playing, especially with these guys. I like being in the lineup. In the end it doesn’t really matter if I play second or left, if I lead off or not. I just want to be in the lineup and help this team to win.”

Along with giving him a little extra time to get ready to bat, Altuve thinks the athletic Peña batting leadoff could boost a lineup that has struggled at times this season.

“Jeremy is one of those guys that has been playing really good for our team,” Altuve said. “He’s taking really good at-bats. He’s very explosive and dynamic on the bases, so when he gets on base a lot of things can happen. Maybe I can bunt him over so Yordan [Alvarez] can drive him in.”

Altuve is a nine-time All-Star. The 2017 AL MVP is hitting .282 with four homers and 12 RBIs this season.

Espada said that he and Altuve often share ideas about the team and that they had been talking about this as a possibility for a while before he made the move.

“He’s always looking for ways to get everyone involved, and he’s playing left field, comes in, maybe give him a little bit more time to get ready between at-bats, just a lot of things that went into this decision,” Espada said. “He’s been around, he knows himself better than anyone else here, so hopefully this could create some opportunities for everyone here, and we can score some runs.”

Information from The Associated Press was used in this report.

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Lightning’s Hagel leaves G4 loss after high hit

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Lightning's Hagel leaves G4 loss after high hit

Tampa Bay Lightning forward Brandon Hagel left his team’s 4-2 loss to the host Florida Panthers in Game 4 of their Eastern Conference first-round series on Monday night after a high hit from defenseman Aaron Ekblad that wasn’t penalized.

With less than 9 minutes left in the second period, Hagel played the puck out of the Tampa Bay zone near the boards. Ekblad skated in on him and delivered a hit with his right forearm that made contact with Hagel’s head, shoving him down in the process.

The back of Hagel’s head hit the ice. He was pulled from the game for concussions concerns. Ekblad did not receive a penalty on the play.

The Lightning trailed the Panthers 1-0 at the time of the hit, but Mitchell Chaffee and Erik Cernak scored two goals in 11 seconds after Hagel left the game to give Tampa Bay a 2-1 lead. When the teams returned for the third period, Hagel was not on the bench.

The Panthers rallied in the third, as Ekblad, Seth Jones and Carter Verhaeghe scored to give Florida a 3-1 series lead. Game 5 is in Tampa on Wednesday.

Game 4 saw Hagel return to the Tampa Bay lineup after he served a one-game suspension for interference on Florida captain Aleksander Barkov in Game 2. The NHL ruled the Barkov wasn’t eligible to be hit and that Hagel made head contact with him. It was the first suspension of this career.

Hagel was one of the best two-way wingers in the league this season, with 35 goals and 55 assists in 82 games for the Lightning.

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