Connect with us

Published

on

Inspirational thought of the week:

Oh, hold him, darling
Please hold him tight
And brush the tear from your eye
You weep because you had a dream last night
You dreamed that he said goodbye

Hush hush, sweet Charlotte
Charlotte, don’t you cry
Hush hush, sweet Charlotte
He’ll love you till he dies

— “Hush, Hush Sweet Charlotte,” Patti Page

Here at Bottom 10 Headquarters, located behind the rich mahogany bookcase where Gene Wojciechowski keeps leather-bound volumes of his “College GameDay” feature scripts, we spend our autumn weekends on the road watching games, but spend most of our weekdays bunkered in at the Bottom 10 basement home office.

For those who don’t know, that’s in Charlotte, aka also the home of the Charlotte 49ers, aka the only FBS team located 10 miles from my house. That living situation can get a little awkward. Like having to still share an apartment with the newly former significant other that you caught making out with your best friend, Tommy, at your birthday party, because neither one of you can afford to move out. No matter how hard you might try to avoid each other, there’s no way to dodge those accidental and overtly uncomfortable encounters in the kitchen, standing in silence at the island waiting on the coffee maker to finish, but both of your skulls echoing with the words that you screamed at that party, “YOU ARE THE WORST! LIKE, RANKED NO. 1 AMONG THE 10 WORST THINGS IN OUR WORLD!”

That’s what it is like for me at the grocery store, the gas station, even at church whenever the Niners are ranked in the Bottom 10. And they have been a lot. On Monday, after Charlotte fired head coach Will Healy, everyone knew what had to be done. Especially the guy in line behind me at Starbucks with his 2019 Bahamas Bowl Runner-Up sweatshirt on, angrily staring at me over the top of his grande pumpkin spice latte. We might as well have been exes in an apartment kitchen.

“I already know you’re gonna have us No. 1,” he grumbled. Then he set down his red pepper egg white bite, raised a fist and slowly cranked up a middle finger. “Well, guess what? So are you.”

With apologies to Peter Quill, Will Healy and Steve Harvey, here are the post-Week 8 Bottom 10 rankings.

1. Charlotte 1-and-7ers (1-7)

Coach-less Charlotte travels to Houston to face Rice, an opponent that used to be a Bottom 10 mainstay and a near-instant W for any visitor, but these Owls are 4-3 and it has been a Texas-sized minute since they were in these rankings. On the bright side, whenever a team from the hometown of Bojangles goes to a place named Rice, you know what that means? Dirty Rice for all!

2. Akronmonious (1-6)

The Zips lost the Wagon Wheel to State of Kent for the fourth straight year. The good news for Kent is it now has a full set of wheels. The bad news for the Zips is that their wagon was left up on blocks in the parking lot and they had to walk the 10 miles back to Akron.

3. No-vada (2-6)

The Oof Pack continues to fall through these rankings like my credit rating whenever I visit the state of Nevada. They’ve now lost six straight, including back-to-back losses to then-top/bottom two Bottom 10 opponents. Reno casinos don’t have windows so that patrons lose track of time, and it indeed seems like an eternity since Nevada opened the season with a win over New Mexico State. Speaking of the Other Aggies …

4. UMess (1-6)

Not so long ago we had circled in permanent marker this weekend’s matchup between the Minutemen and New Mexico State as a potential Pillow Fight of the Year of the Century Mega Bowl, but then NMSU went and won two out of three. How dare they! But, in a plot twist-a-roo, UMass might still have a PFOTYOTCMB on the schedule. No, it isn’t the games against UCan’t or Arkansaw State. It’s the Nov. 19 tilt against another set of Aggies. These guys …

5. Agricultural & Mechanical College of Texas (3-4)

As a kid, I saved money for months from doing chores around the house, washing cars around the neighborhood, even scrounging up bottles from around town to get the deposit change. Why? To buy a special spy X-ray camera that I saw advertised in the back of a comic book. My dad warned me not to believe it, that maybe my time and dollars were better spent elsewhere, saying, “It’ll just be another cheap piece of plastic like all of the other stuff you bought, like the sneakers that were going to make you run faster and the rubber bands that were going to make your muscles look like Superman’s.” But, undeterred, I kept going back to that ad, the one that promised that this would be different, finally a foolproof pathway to unimaginable superpowers. When the spy X-ray camera arrived, it was indeed just another piece of plastic. Also, Texas A&M.

6. North by Northworstern (1-6)

This month the Mildcats have lost to Wisconsin, a team that forgot to bring a head coach; Maryland, a team that has forgotten what conference it’s supposed to be in, and now faces Iowa, a team that has forgotten that its stadium has end zones.

7. US(notC)F (1-6)

This weekend the Bulls kick off in Houston at noon ET, two hours before Charlotte plays at Rice, which is only 5 miles away. If they lose to the Cougars, they should drive over to Rice Stadium, buy a bunch of tickets and watch, but keep their uniforms on. That way if Charlotte loses too, USF could just run out onto the field to the “West Side Story” rumble song and challenge the Niners to the first-ever Impromptu Pillow Fight of the Week.

8. Huh-why-yuh (2-6)

Two weeks ago, the Warriors climbed out of the No. 2 Bottom 10 spot by beating Nevada. But they followed that up by losing to Colorado State, who three weeks ago climbed out of the No. 1 Bottom 10 spot by beating Nevada. Remember, Nevada started the season with a win over New Mexico State and knocked it into the No. 1 top/bottom spot, but then NMSU climbed out of that spot by beating … Hawai’i. Have you seen the new “Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania” trailer? Janet van Dyne, aka Michelle Pfeiffer, explains, “It’s a secret universe located beneath ours.” You thought she was talking about the Quantum realm? No, she’s describing the Mountain West.

9. Colora-duh (1-6)

The absence of Colorado State from these rankings makes room for the Rams’ hated neighbors to the north, who followed up their emotional, shocking first win of the season at Cal with an emotional, shocking 33-point loss at Oregon State. Now the Buffs welcome Bottom 10 Wait Listers Arizona Skate for a game that is also shocking in that it kicks off at 7:30 p.m. ET. It feels more apropos to give this a #Pac12AfterDark time slot so that it can air alongside 1-900 chatline ads and Jim Bakker’s infomercials selling doomsday barrels of pancake batter.

10. ULM (pronounced “Uhlm”) (2-6)

The Fightin’ Terry Bowdens have quietly piecemealed an impressive Bottom 10 résumé, a run that began with a 17-point Week 5 loss to then-one-win Arkansaw State and most recently a 24-point shelling from the tanks of then-two-win Army. The next two weeks bring in-conference matchups with a pair of fellow #FunBelt members with one conference win, the Texas State Armadillos and Georgia State Not Southern. Then the WarHocks to close the year with tough outings against Troy, which leads the Sun Belt West division, and Southern Miss, which is currently second in the division and first in the nation in unwanted headlines created by guys who played quarterback at their school in the late 1980s.

Waiting list: Georgia State Not Southern, FI(not A)U, Whew Mexico, Whew Mexico State, Temple of Doom, Living on Tulsa Time, Arizona Skate, Virginia Tech Nokies, Arkan-saw State, Northern Ill-ugh-noise, Central not Western or Eastern Michigan, Lose-iana Tech, political ads interrupting football games.

Continue Reading

Sports

Rebuilding Flyers hire Tocchet as head coach

Published

on

By

Rebuilding Flyers hire Tocchet as head coach

The Philadelphia Flyers have hired Rick Tocchet as their next head coach, it was announced Wednesday.

The framework of the deal puts Tocchet among the highest-paid coaches in the NHL, sources told ESPN.

“I am very happy to welcome Rick Tocchet as our head coach,” general manager Daniel Briere said in a statement. “During this process it became clear that Rick was the absolute right coach to lead our team. He has enjoyed the highest level of success both as a player and coach.

“Rick’s ability to teach and understand his players, combined with his passion for winning, brings out the best in young players at different stages of their development and has earned the respect and confidence of highly talented All-Stars and veteran players alike.”

Tocchet, 61, is already in the Flyers Hall of Fame after spending parts of 11 seasons with the team during his 18-year playing career.

The Flyers still consider themselves in a rebuild phase after missing the playoffs for the fifth consecutive season. Philadelphia fired John Tortorella in March after philosophical differences emerged between the coach and the front office.

Brad Shaw served as interim coach for the remainder of the season, and the Flyers (33-39-10) finished tied for last place in the Eastern Conference.

“I’ve always been a Flyer at heart and have taken that passion and energy that embodies this city and organization with me throughout my career,” Tocchet said. “… I couldn’t be more excited to lead this team back among the NHL elite where we belong. We have a lot of work to do and much to accomplish, but I am confident in the direction we are heading and determined to get us there.”

Tocchet, who stepped down as coach of the Vancouver Canucks after the season as his three-year contract expired, was among the most desirable candidates in a crowded coaching market.

According to sources, Tocchet also spoke with the Seattle Kraken and the Anaheim Ducks, who never formally interviewed Tocchet before hiring Joel Quenneville last week. The Boston Bruins also had Tocchet high on their list.

“What is impressive about Rick is that players gravitate towards him and develop a strong relationship in the process,” team president Keith Jones said in a statement. “There is a genuine trust that he will do everything he can to bring success to the team.”

Tocchet was also considering a return to television next season, sources told ESPN, after he served as a regular on TNT’s coverage before joining the Canucks. He has also appeared on the network’s coverage during the 2024-25 Stanley Cup playoffs.

Tocchet left Vancouver just one year removed from winning the Jack Adams Award. The Canucks, after a season of turmoil that included the trade of center J.T. Miller to the New York Rangers, missed the playoffs by six points.

Tocchet, who replaced Bruce Boudreau as Canucks coach in January 2023, had previous head coaching stints with the Tampa Bay Lightning and Arizona Coyotes. His career NHL coaching record is 286-265-87 in the regular season and 11-11 in the playoffs.

Tocchet, who also played for the Coyotes, becomes the 14th individual to have played for/coached multiple teams in NHL history, according to ESPN Research. That list also includes Craig Berube, who played for/coached the Flyers and now the Maple Leafs, and Jim Montgomery, who played for/coached the Stars and now the Blues.

Continue Reading

Sports

Thompson powers U.S. past Norway in overtime

Published

on

By

Thompson powers U.S. past Norway in overtime

HERNING, Denmark — Tage Thompson completed his hat trick with a power-play goal in overtime to give the United States a 6-5 win over Norway after the Americans squandered a four-goal lead at the ice hockey world championship on Wednesday.

Norway forced overtime when defenseman Stian Solberg scored with 1:27 left in regulation, as the Anaheim Ducks prospect completed a hat trick of his own.

Thompson, a Buffalo Sabres center, scored the winner 4:09 into overtime for the U.S., which has eight points in Group B while Norway earns its first point.

“We did some good things and it was obviously great to get the win,” U.S. head coach Ryan Warsofsky said. “We’ll build on this as we get set to take on a very good Germany team on Saturday.”

For the Americans, captain Clayton Keller had a goal and two assists, and Cutter Gauthier and Michael McCarron added a goal each for the U.S. to rebound from a loss to Switzerland.

Gauthier put the U.S. 1-0 ahead 4:50 into the game before Keller hit the top corner of the net to double the lead 7:18 into the frame.

Gauthier is tied with Canada forward Bo Horvat atop the goal scoring table with four goals.

Solberg reduced the deficit to 2-1 on the power play before Thompson and McCarron completed the four-goal period for the U.S.

Thompson added his second 2:55 into the middle period for a 5-1 lead.

Norway was not done, though.

Solberg had his second goal on a power play for Norway to trail 5-2 and Martin Ronnild added another one on a breakaway still in the frame.

Midway through the third, Noah Steen made it a one-goal game before Norway pulled its goalie for an extra attacker — and Solberg scored to make it 5-5.

“It was an important game for us and taking a point was huge,” Solberg said. “I am happy for the team and happy for myself.”

Columbus Blue Jackets defenseman Zach Werenski had an assist for the U.S. in his first game at the worlds. He arrived Monday but his equipment was delayed and he couldn’t play in the 3-0 loss to Switzerland that day.

Werenski is one of three finalists for the Norris Trophy given to the NHL’s top defenseman.

In Stockholm, Slovakia beat France 2-1 for its second win. France remains on one point.

Sweden faces Latvia later in the day in Stockholm while Denmark plays Kazakhstan in Herning.

Continue Reading

Sports

Canucks elevate assistant Foote to head coach

Published

on

By

Canucks elevate assistant Foote to head coach

The Vancouver Canucks have named Adam Foote as their new head coach, the team announced Wednesday.

Foote, 53, had served as an assistant coach under head coach Rick Tocchet for the last three seasons. His only previous head coaching experience was one season behind the bench of the WHL Kelowna Rockets, going 29-28-6 in 63 games in 2019-20.

He’s the 22nd head coach in franchise history. TSN reported that Foote agreed to a three-year deal.

Tocchet stepped down after his three-year contract expired at the conclusion of the 2024-25 season. Vancouver opted not to exercise its contract option on Tocchet, having instead offered him a large extension. Team president Jim Rutherford said that the Canucks “did everything in our power” to retain Tocchet but that “he may have his mind somewhere else.”

Sources told ESPN on Wednesday that Tocchet will be the next head coach of the Philadelphia Flyers, with whom he played for 11 seasons.

Foote won two Stanley Cups as a player with the Colorado Avalanche (1996 and 2001) and was considered one of the NHL’s premier defensive defensemen during his 19-season career. Foote also played for the Quebec Nordiques before the franchise moved to Colorado and for the Columbus Blue Jackets.

“His past experiences on the ice have translated nicely into a coaching style that fits our organization’s goals and vision. He has worked extremely hard the past few years, gaining our players’ respect and trust for his strong communication and honest, straightforward opinion. He knows this group better than anyone else we interviewed and has inside knowledge and understanding of what it will take to get us back to where we want to be,” Canucks GM Patrik Allvin said.

Foote wasn’t the only internal candidate interviewed for the Vancouver head coaching job. AHL Abbotsford head coach Manny Malhotra was also under consideration.

Foote takes over a Canucks team that failed to make the playoffs after advancing to the second round in 2023-24. Vancouver has made the postseason only twice in the past 10 NHL seasons. The Canucks face a series of questions heading into next season, from the fate of free agent winger Brock Boeser to how to get 26-year-old star center Elias Pettersson back on track offensively. But the hiring of Foote might serve to address another one of the team’s uncertainties: the fate of captain Quinn Hughes.

The defenseman is signed through the 2026-27 season, but Rutherford recently sparked speculation that Hughes might seek to eventually leave Vancouver to play with brothers Jack and Luke, who are currently with the New Jersey Devils.

“He’s said before he wants to play with his brothers, and that would be partly out of our control,” Rutherford said.

Foote spent the past two seasons working with the team’s defensemen. They were the two best seasons of Quinn Hughes’ NHL career, with him winning the Norris Trophy in 2023-24 and being a finalist for the award again this season. Now, the man who got the best out of the captain is sticking around as the team’s new head coach.

Cal Foote, son of Adam Foote, is one of five players from Canada’s 2018 world junior championships team facing sexual assault charges from an incident in a London, Ontario, hotel room. The trial is ongoing. All five players have pleaded not guilty.

Continue Reading

Trending