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Dating apps are not my strong point.

Loathing the prospect of spending another Valentine’s Day stuck for things to say on Hinge, Bumble and the like, I wondered if the internet’s new favourite assistant – ChatGPT – could help secure a date.

After all, it’s already written complex computer code, crafted successful job applications, composed songs, and aced an 11-year-old’s homework.

Before daring to take its suggestions into the dating trenches, I enlisted an expert to assess the chatbot’s ability to strike up conversation.

For dating coach Hayley Quinn, this was undoubtedly one of her strangest assignments. For me, it was a chance to finally find a better conversation starter than a GIF of Obi-Wan Kenobi saying “hello there”.

‘Avoid physical compliments’

We started by assessing ChatGPT’s top three chat-up lines.

“Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.”

Alarm bells are ringing immediately here, says Coach Quinn.

“In a post #MeToo era, physical compliments are dodgy territory. Instead of focusing on someone’s looks, try complimenting them on an aspect of their personality.”

“If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cutecumber.”

Even I think this one’s bad, but Coach Quinn is more forgiving.

“In the age of dating apps, funny first messages can go a long way. Just make sure yours is original, and not one a thousand people (or AIs) have used before.”

“Do you believe in love at first swipe, or do I need to unmatch and match with you again?”

It’s the lack of originality that’s done ChatGPT in here again, says Coach Quinn.

That highlights the chatbot’s established limitations. It’s a so-called large language model trained on a massive amount of data, but that means it draws on things that have already been written.

Dating expert Hayley Quinn
Image:
Dating expert Hayley Quinn

‘Presumptuous and creepy’

Some dating apps have tried to pivot away from a pure focus on matching based on photos.

But they no doubt remain the key feature – and so we asked ChatGPT for some catch-all compliments.

“Your smile is so warm and inviting!”

Coach Quinn is not very impressed: “Can we ban the use of the word ‘inviting’? This message comes across as presumptive to the point of creepy.”

“This photo really captures your adventurous and fun-loving spirit.”

A bit like the “cutecumber” line, ChatGPT might be on to something here.

Coach Quinn suggests a tweak: “Edit this to make it shorter and sharper – saying ‘adventurous’ and ‘fun-loving’ is borderline tautology. Keep it to a snappier: ‘This photo captures your spirit.'”

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Conversation starters

If a match is secured, ChatGPT has some conversation ideas.

“What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve done recently?”

Coach Quinn says: “A good online dating rule of thumb is to never ask ‘how are you?’.

“By creating a more specific question to answer, ChatGPT’s suggestion is more likely to gain a response.”

“If you could be any superhero, who would you be and why?”

Coach Quinn reckons this would work as an opening gambit on a dating app, although “overly random” if you attempted it in real life.

“Do you have any travel plans coming up?”

Not quite so good from ChatGPT here, but it’s done the groundwork for a better question.

Coach Quinn suggests: “You have a plane ticket to somewhere tomorrow… what’s the destination and why?”

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Taking things further… or not

So you’ve talked about spontaneous things, shared your superhero preferences, and talked travel.

If you don’t see things going further, ChatGPT offered ways of bringing the conversation to an end.

“It was great chatting with you, but I think it’s time for us to move on.”

“Ouch,” says Coach Quinn.

“Try just saying, ‘it was great chatting to you’, shake hands, smile, leave.”

“I appreciate the conversation, but I don’t think we have a strong connection. Best of luck in your search.”

Much better! As Coach Quinn says, it’s “simple, clear and does the trick”.

But what if things have been going well, and it’s time to ask your match on a date?

“Would you prefer a picnic in the park, a hike, or checking out a museum this weekend?”

“Giving options is wise, but try to phrase this in a way that shows greater leadership,” says Coach Quinn.

And don’t pester with specific dates and locations until you know they’re excited about seeing you.

“I’ve really enjoyed our conversations so far, and I can’t wait to meet you in person.”

“Expressing enthusiasm several dates in, when you know they’re on the same page is great,” says Coach Quinn

“Just don’t go overboard and scare them off before date one. Play it cool, ChatGPT!”

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So, can AI help you date?

If all you want is some general advice to get you started, the answer may be yes.

ChatGPT signed off our dating advice session by suggesting we “keep the tone light and friendly”, not coming across as “pushy and too eager”.

“A nice, if a little generic, pearl of wisdom,” says Quinn.

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But don’t go relying on ChatGPT as some sort of digital Cyrano de Bergerac. While it may give better dating advice than plenty of your friends, you’ll want to do a sense check before taking its suggestions on board.

Is it inappropriate? Does it sound inauthentic? Do I sound like a robot?

If the answer’s yes, it’s probably time to swipe left on this particular love guru.

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‘Our country’s ruined’: Protesters on why they oppose asylum hotels

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'Our country's ruined': Protesters on why they oppose asylum hotels

“It’s an invasion,” Dinah Bentley tells me, standing next to a cardboard cut-out of Nigel Farage.

The 78-year-old retired teacher says she “doesn’t laud” the Reform MP, whose grinning likeness is a permanent fixture in her West Yorkshire conservatory, but he “says what I believe”.

“Everybody talks about migration, but our country’s ruined,” Dinah adds. “They’ve ruined it.”

The “they” in her mind? People who have crossed into the UK on small boats.

We have seen asylum hotel protests intensify over the summer and wanted to speak to the people who’ve joined them.

Over the coming weeks, we’ll speak with counter-protesters too, but today, we meet Dinah, a grandmother of two who has joined those calling on asylum hotels to close.

Dinah says she fears for her granddaughters' safety
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Dinah says she fears for her granddaughters’ safety

She was, like many of the protesters we met, initially sceptical to speak to a journalist.

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Dinah says she “doesn’t watch mainstream news” because of “media lies” over Brexit.

Instead, she says she gets her news from social media.

It was on social media that Dinah learnt about a protest being organised outside a hotel in Wakefield, which has housed asylum seekers for several years.

It was the first migration-related protest she had ever attended.

“We’ve put up with so much for so long and I think ordinary people now, they’ve decided it’s no good sitting, doing nothing,” Dinah says.

After reading about a male asylum seeker being charged with a sexual assault in Epping, she says she is “fearful” for her granddaughters’ safety.

“They’re undocumented,” she says, referring to those who have arrived in the UK on small boats.

“We know nothing about them. We don’t know where they are wandering the streets. It’s not right, is it?”

She’s also angry about the cost of housing asylum seekers in hotels.

Dinah says Nigel Farage 'says what I believe'
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Dinah says Nigel Farage ‘says what I believe’

I ask Dinah what she thinks about the government plan to close asylum hotels, stop illegal crossings and deport people who do not have a legal right to remain.

“It’s all talk, all talk”, she says. “I don’t believe them.”

“I would be happy if the Navy went into the Channel, we’re an island for God’s sake, and stopped the boats.

“That would make me over the moon.”

Dinah tells us people used to be “afraid” of saying what they really thought about migration.

No more, she says.

The ‘migrant watch’ group

On the other side of Wakefield, we meet 47-year-old James Crashley.

He’s also been to the local asylum hotel protests.

An army veteran and former policeman, James says he does not think asylum seekers should be housed in hotels or houses of multiple occupancy.

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Where are UK’s asylum seekers from?

James has been trying to set up a 'community watch'
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James has been trying to set up a ‘community watch’

“I’ve served in Kosovo and in Iraq, within the British Army,” he says. “And if I can be housed in a tent for six months, then they can too.”

The prime minister has pledged to end the “costly use of hotels to house asylum seekers in this parliament” – which would be 2029, if not earlier.

James has, by his own admission, become somewhat notorious in his local area for trying to set up what he’s called a “community watch”.

He says the police are “very good at dealing with serious crime” but believes “they seem to forget that day-to-day crime exists”.

James stresses the group 'isn't vigilantism'
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James stresses the group ‘isn’t vigilantism’

Called “5 Town Migrant Watch” and advertised by him on social media, James says the volunteer group will support the Wakefield hotel protests and act as a “gentle presence” in public areas to tackle “all anti-social behaviour”.

But it will focus on “illegal migrant men” who James describes as having “conflicting traditions and cultures”.

“They come from cultures that aren’t as civilised as ours,” he says. “They don’t seem to adhere to our laws.

“And because of the cultural differences, as in the sexual assaults on children and women, they believe that’s fine in their cultures. Well, it’s not here.”

I say to James that no culture accepts sexual assaults on women and children are “fine”, a point he says he “accepts”.

But he claims that, by definition, people have already “broken the law” when they arrive on small boats in the first place.

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Where are UK’s asylum seekers from?

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James’ group has attracted hundreds of supporters online, but also criticism from people who believe the group – and James himself – is not only divisive but dangerous.

James admits he has previously had a police caution for a public order offence, not related to the community watch, but stresses this group “isn’t vigilantism”.

“It’s a peaceful movement,” he says. “But if needs be, we’ll stand our ground and will prevent crime. We’re not allowed to commit crime.”

‘People are angry’

A few days later, we meet Dinah again outside the Cedar Court Hotel in Wakefield.

Protesters line the road, waving Union and St George’s flags. Some are shouting “send them back” and “stop the boats”.

The protesters and counter-protesters
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The protesters and counter-protesters

Groups of counter-protesters are there too, chanting “Nazi scum” over the police barricade.

I ask Dinah how that feels.

“I think it’s hilarious,” she says. “I know what I am, I don’t value their opinion, so I couldn’t care less what they call me.”

But standing next to Dinah, also waving a Union flag, is Sharon.

She says she’s “a little bit frightened being here” and feels it’s unfair to be put in that position just “to try and get the government to listen to you”.

She added: “I’m a 60-year-old mum. I work 40 hours a week. And nobody gives me anything free. You just want fairness.”

Sharon says she wants 'fairness'
Image:
Sharon says she wants ‘fairness’

In the crowd, we find James.

I ask him what he thinks about the government plan to appeal a court ruling to shut the asylum hotel in Epping.

“Of course they were going to try and block it,” he tells me.

Dinah says she 'doesn't value' the opinion of counter-protesters
Image:
Dinah says she ‘doesn’t value’ the opinion of counter-protesters

“The smiles here and the good attitude and the positivity is masking the anger of what’s happened to the English.

“People are angry. People know that once they’re out of here,” he says, gesturing at the hotel behind us, “they’re going to be put in the community”.

“What happens then, who knows?”

Dinah and James are among thousands of protesters who share a sense of being ignored by the government – leaving an overwhelming sense of pressure and uncertainty about what will happen next.

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UK summons Russian ambassador after British Council building hit in Kyiv

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UK summons Russian ambassador after British Council building hit in Kyiv

The Russian ambassador to the UK has been summoned by the Foreign Office following attacks on Kyiv overnight.

It comes after the British Council building in the Ukrainian capital suffered major damage in Russian strikes.

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Foreign Secretary David Lammy confirmed the government had summoned Andrey Kelin in response.

Mr Kelin was seen arriving at the Foreign Office building in Whitehall today.

Russian ambassador to the UK Andrey Kelin arrives at the Foreign Office building in Whitehall
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Russian ambassador to the UK Andrey Kelin arrives at the Foreign Office building in Whitehall

Mr Lammy posted on X: “Putin’s strikes last night killed civilians, destroyed homes and damaged buildings, including the British Council and EU Delegation in Kyiv.

“We have summoned the Russian Ambassador. The killing and destruction must stop.”

The British Council’s chief executive, Scott McDonald, said their guard for the building was injured but “stable”.

“At the insistence of my amazing colleagues, we will continue operations in Ukraine today wherever possible,” he said.

“Their resilience is awe-inspiring, and I am deeply thankful they are all safe.”

Earlier, Sir Keir Starmer said: “My thoughts are with all those affected by the senseless Russian strikes on Kyiv, which have damaged the British Council building.

“Putin is killing children and civilians, and sabotaging hopes of peace. This bloodshed must end.”

The British Council is an arms-length body from the government, and says its mission is to “support peace and prosperity by building connections, understanding and trust between people in the UK and countries worldwide”.

It facilitates schemes like working, living and learning abroad for British people.

Most of its funding comes from the fees it charges people for its services, but it does also get funding from the Foreign Commonwealth and Development Office (FCDO).

As well as the attack on the British Council building, Russia also targeted the EU delegation building in the Ukrainian capital overnight.

Ursula von der Leyen, the president of the European Commission, told reporters two missiles hit within 50 metres of the site in 20 seconds.

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And Kaja Kallas, the EU’s foreign policy chief, said the bloc was also summoning Russia’s ambassador following the strike.

“No diplomatic mission should ever be a target,” she said.

The attacks came as part of wider strikes on Kyiv, which destroyed homes and buildings and killed at least 15 people and injured 38, according to Ukrainian officials.

Russia has said it targeted military sites and air bases in its large overnight strike on Ukraine – and that it is still interested in negotiations to meet its aims.

“The special military operation continues,” he said, referring to Russia’s full-scale invasion of Ukraine, which it launched in February 2022.

“You see that strikes on Russian infrastructure facilities are also continuing, and often Russian civilian infrastructure is targeted by the Kyiv regime.”

He added: “At the same time, Russia will maintain its interest in continuing the negotiation process in order to achieve the goals we face through political and diplomatic means.”

Russia’s latest attack on Ukraine has been widely condemned, with Germany’s foreign minister Johann Wadephul saying there must be “consequences”.

“Last night we once again experienced in a terrible way how Russia attacked and bombed Kyiv, civilians died, children died, and the European Union delegation was also attacked,” he told reporters.

“And that cannot remain without consequences.”

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Mr Wadephul added that Germany wanted to show it was considering a further response and that any action would be taken jointly by the EU.

A Foreign Commonwealth and Development Office Spokesperson said: “The UK condemns in the strongest terms these outrageous attacks on Ukrainians and the damage done to the British Council and EU Delegation.

“Russia’s increasing attacks on Ukrainian civilians and cities, including Kyiv, are an escalation of the war and deeply irresponsible and are further sabotaging international peace efforts.

“We have made clear to the Russians that such actions will only harden UK and Western resolve to support Ukraine and bring an end to this unjustified war.

“Russia must stop this senseless killing and destruction immediately.”

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Former Met Police volunteer guilty of raping and sexually assaulting a child

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Former Met Police volunteer guilty of raping and sexually assaulting a child

A former Metropolitan Police volunteer has been found guilty of raping and sexually assaulting a child.

James Bubb, who now identifies as a woman named Gwyn Samuels, assaulted the victim multiple times when she was between the ages of 12 and 18.

Jurors were told Bubb, who identified as male at the time of the offences, would be referred to by their biological sex when allegations were being discussed throughout the trial.

Bubb met the victim on a video chat site in 2018, when he was around 21 and she was 12 years old. They then met in person for the first time at a Christian festival a few months later, the court was told.

The trial heard Bubb sexually assaulted the girl in public shortly before her 13th birthday, and that he was violent towards the girl when he raped her in her early teens.

Pic: Thames Valley Police
Image:
Pic: Thames Valley Police

In relation to the complainant, Bubb was on Thursday found guilty of one count of raping a child under 13, one count of sexual activity with a child, one count of assault of a child under 13 by penetration, and one count of assault by penetration.

He was found not guilty of one count of rape and one count of sexual activity with a child in relation to that complainant, and found guilty of one count of rape against a second person.

The defendant made no expression as the verdicts were read out, but sobbed with their head in their hands after the foreman finished speaking.

Bubb, who is now 27, started training with the Met in 2020.

The first victim said the defendant spoke “a lot about the powers he had” in his role as a special constable.

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The second complainant was a woman Bubb met online while posing as a 16-year-old girl.

They met when the woman had just turned 18, and were in an on-off relationship between January 2018 and February 2023.

She said Bubb used “BDSM and kink as a way of creating control” over her, and that he would “use police training techniques” on her.

“The control, the power he got, it sure as hell wasn’t consensual,” she told police.

Bubb, of Chesham, Buckinghamshire, will be sentenced at a later date.

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