Bottom 10: Back so soon, Sooners?
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Ryan McGee, ESPN Senior Writer
Inspirational thought of the week:
Oh, wait a minute, mister
I didn’t even kiss her
Don’t want no trouble with you
And I know you don’t owe me
But I wish you’d let me
Ask one favor from you …
Oh, won’t you gimme three steps, gimme three steps, mister
Gimme three steps towards the door?
Gimme three steps, gimme three steps, mister
And you’ll never see me no more
— “Gimme Three Steps,” Lynyrd Skynyrd
Here at Bottom 10 Headquarters, located in the track and field sprinting facility where Molly McGrath prepares to run down head coaches for postgame interviews, we are in disbelief at how little time we have left. Not on this earth. That’s too sad. But rather how little time is left in the 2023 college football season. And, well, OK, now that we think about it, yes, that’s sad, too.
There are three weekends remaining. Three. Like the Rule of Threes. Like Babe Ruth. Like Dale Earnhardt. Like Dwayne Wade. Like Joe Montana at Notre Dame. And like the number of wins it will likely take in order for a team to find its way off this list before it becomes the final Bottom 10 standings for the season, forever etched in stone. Or, more realistically, forever saved on a free handout thumb drive that we received from a press junket for a since-defunct bowl game. The same one we use to keep a handful of old recipes and a list of passwords that no longer work, all stored in a folder alongside some low-res renderings of the logo for the San Jose Silicon Valley Classic.
With apologies to Tre Harris, RG3, Steven Threet and Steve Harvey, here’s the Week 11 Bottom 10.
1. Sam Houston We Have Problem (1-8)
The Bearkats kaptured their introduktory FCS viktory by konquering Kennesaw State 24-21 with a kick as the klock kounted down to the konklusion of the kontest. Per kontra, they unsukcessfully relokated from this ranking bekause Kennesaw’s only viktories on the 2023 kalendar kame against Tuskulum and Linkoln University.
2. State of Kent (1-8)
After a miserable couple of weeks of weeknight #MACtion misery, Nick Saban’s alma mater has a week off to reset to a weekend schedule and a likely Pillow Fight of the Week against Baller State on, fittingly, Week 13.
3. EC-Yew (1-8)
The Pie Rats nearly pulled off an upset of No. 24 Tulane, leading 10-0 in the first quarter before losing the map to the end zone and losing 13-10. The only group of pirates to score this little are the ones who have been trying to get that dog to hand them the keys to their Disneyland jail cell since 1967.
4. UCan’t (1-8)
The Huskies lost the $1.8 Million Paycheck Bowl to Tennessee 59-3 and now travel to undefeated James Madison for the Wait You Mean We Don’t Get A Bunch Of Money For This One, Too? Bowl.
5. Boomer Swooner (7-2)
How often does a team lock up consecutive Coveted Fifth Spots? Looking at the Bottom 10 record book, we can’t find evidence that it has happened before. OK, if we’re being honest, we couldn’t actually open the Bottom 10 record book because someone spilled a bunch of Billy Sims Barbecue Sauce all over it and the pages are stuck together. Also, we may or may not have put OU back in here because we just thought of that Swooner name and it was too good not to use.
6. Akronmonious (2-7)
The Zips celebrated last week’s Wagon Wheel victory over State of Kent by enjoying an open Saturday and then immediately traveling to Miami of Ohio for a Wednesday night matchup in which they are a 17.5-point underdog and, according to the magically and creepily accurate FPI formula, have a 6.3% chance of winning. It’s like that time I celebrated my birthday at Chuck E. Cheese, then as I walked across the parking lot afterward, was attacked by a flock of buzzards trying to take my leftover pizza.
7. ULM (pronounced “UHLM”) (2-7)
Ulm, speaking of agitated birds of prey, the, ulm, Warhawks jumped up/fell down these rankings after losing, ulm, 24-7 to another gaggle of angry birds, the then-fifth-ranked Southern Missed Golden Eagles. Now, ulm, Terry Bowden’s squad faces Troy and Ole Miss in back-to-back weeks, teams with a combined record of, ulm, 15-3. That seems ulmpossible.
8. Southern Missed (2-7)
The good news is that Southern Miss finally found its second victory of the season, snapping a seven-game losing streak that dated back to the season opener against Alcorn State. The bad news is that during the game Brett Favre went through everyone’s wallets and bought a bunch of volleyball nets.
9. Van-duh-bilt Commode Doors (2-8)
Vandy opened the season with a win over season-long Bottom 10 Wait Listers Huh-Why-Yuh, then beat Alabama A&M, which is neither the Alabama nor the A&M you’re thinking of, before losing eight straight games and landing here. Now it lands in Columbia, South Carolina, where the disappointing 3-6 Gamecocks just beat the Jacksonville State Other Gamecocks. There is no other college football team in the nation that uses Commodores, but sources tell Bottom 10 JortsCenter that the Gloria Vanderbilt jeans people would be willing to have a West Side Story-style dance fight in the Garment District.
10. The Pitt and the Pendulum (2-7)
So Pitt has two wins, with one victory over then-14th-ranked Louisville. That earns the Panthers this spot over Virginia, which also has two wins, with one victory over then-10th-ranked North Carolina. And they both edged out Cincinnati, which has two wins, but one of those was over Pitt. And they all are a notch above/below Pur-don’t, which has two wins, with one over Virginia Tech, which has only four wins, but one of those came against Pitt. In related news, #goacc, y’all.
Waiting List: Virginugh, the Bearcats with a “c”, Pur-do’n’t, No-vada, Rod Tidwell’s Alma Mater, Muddled Tennessee, hiding poorly on the Central Michigan sideline.
Hockey fans are close to knowing the identities of the 16 Stanley Cup playoff teams for 2025. But the battles for seeding continue to rage — as does the jockeying for position in the draft lottery order.
Here’s what to monitor during Thursday’s 10-game slate — and we hope you can watch on multiple devices!
Chicago Blackhawks at Boston Bruins
7 p.m. (ESPN+)
These two Original Six franchises will be back in the postseason again at some point, but not this season. Chicago begins the night second in the draft lottery order, three points back of the San Jose Sharks. The Bruins are fourth heading into Thursday night, tied in points with the Philadelphia Flyers.
Detroit Red Wings at Florida Panthers
7 p.m. (ESPN+)
The Red Wings begin the evening eight points behind the Canadiens for the final wild-card spot in the East (Tuesday’s loss to Montreal certainly didn’t help). A regulation loss here eliminates them. After their win Tuesday over the Toronto Maple Leafs, the Panthers are right back in the race atop the Atlantic Division. As play begins Thursday, the Leafs are No. 1 with 100 points and 39 regulation wins, the Tampa Bay Lightning are second (97, 39) and the Panthers are third (94, 36).
Buffalo Sabres at Columbus Blue Jackets
7 p.m. (ESPN+)
The Sabres picked a strange time to go on a heater, as they are 8-2-0 in their last 10; maybe there will be some carry-over to start 2025-26? In any event, Buffalo begins the evening eighth in the draft lotto order, three spots (and three points) ahead of Columbus. The Blue Jackets stayed in the playoff race probably longer than anyone outside their dressing room believed they would, but they’ll be officially eliminated with another loss.
Carolina Hurricanes at Washington Capitals
7:30 p.m. (ESPN+/Hulu/Disney+)
There was some nastiness the last time these two squads played; will we see retribution — particularly against Carolina’s Jalen Chatfield — on Thursday? As for the long-term impact, Washington is locked in as the No. 1 seed in the Metro, and Carolina needs one point to clinch the No. 2 seed over the New Jersey Devils.
New York Rangers at New York Islanders
7:30 p.m. (ESPN+)
From two Metro teams that have clinched a playoff spot to two who are on the cusp of elimination (after qualifying last spring). This rivalry game has a bit less juice than usual given the reality of the mathematics. The Rangers are currently 10th in the draft lottery order, the Isles 12th.
Winnipeg Jets at Dallas Stars
8 p.m. (ESPN+)
If the Stars have plans to overtake the Jets for the top overall seed in the West, they’ll need to win this one. Winnipeg enters the game four points (and one regulation win) ahead. So it’s not completely a must-win for the Stars’ quest for the No. 1 spot, but it’d certainly be a lot better for those chances if they won.
Vancouver Canucks at Colorado Avalanche
9 p.m. (ESPN+)
The Canucks were officially eliminated Wednesday night, and are currently 15th in the draft lottery order, a point back of the Hockey Club. As for the Avalanche, they are nearly locked into position as the Central’s No. 3 seed.
Nashville Predators at Utah Hockey Club
9 p.m. (ESPN+)
The HC has been playing inspired hockey as of late, but it was too late to get the final playoff spot, as they were eliminated Wednesday night. Meanwhile, Nashville begins play third in the draft lotto order, 10 points behind Chicago and seven ahead of the No. 4 Flyers.
Seattle Kraken at Vegas Golden Knights
10 p.m. (ESPN+)
This wasn’t the best season in Seattle Kraken history, though the club will likely get a top-10 draft pick this summer to continue the build; heading into Thursday, the Kraken are sixth in the draft lottery order, one point behind the Flyers and Bruins, and two ahead of the Penguins and Sabres.
Anaheim Ducks at Los Angeles Kings
10 p.m. (ESPN+/Hulu/Disney+)
Speaking of the Ducks, a win over their SoCal rivals would diminish the Kings’ chances of catching Vegas for the No. 1 seed in the Pacific; L.A. begins the evening six points back.
With the regular season ending April 17, we’ll help you track it all with the NHL playoff watch. As we traverse the final stretch, we’ll provide details on all the playoff races, along with the teams jockeying for position in the 2025 NHL draft lottery.
Note: Playoff chances are via Stathletes.
Jump ahead:
Current playoff matchups
Today’s schedule
Yesterday’s scores
Expanded standings
Race for No. 1 pick
Current playoff matchups
Eastern Conference
A1 Toronto Maple Leafs vs. WC1 Ottawa Senators
A2 Tampa Bay Lightning vs. A3 Florida Panthers
M1 Washington Capitals vs. WC2 Montreal Canadiens
M2 Carolina Hurricanes vs. M3 New Jersey Devils
Western Conference
C1 Winnipeg Jets vs. WC2 St. Louis Blues
C2 Dallas Stars vs. C3 Colorado Avalanche
P1 Vegas Golden Knights vs. WC1 Minnesota Wild
P2 Los Angeles Kings vs. P3 Edmonton Oilers
Thursday’s games
Note: All times ET. All games not on TNT or NHL Network are available to stream on ESPN+ (local blackout restrictions apply).
Chicago Blackhawks at Boston Bruins, 7 p.m.
Detroit Red Wings at Florida Panthers, 7 p.m.
Buffalo Sabres at Columbus Blue Jackets, 7 p.m.
Carolina Hurricanes at Washington Capitals, 7:30 p.m. (ESPN+/Hulu/Disney+)
New York Rangers at New York Islanders, 7:30 p.m.
Winnipeg Jets at Dallas Stars, 8 p.m.
Vancouver Canucks at Colorado Avalanche, 9 p.m.
Nashville Predators at Utah Hockey Club, 9 p.m.
Seattle Kraken at Vegas Golden Knights, 10 p.m.
Anaheim Ducks at Los Angeles Kings, 10 p.m. (ESPN+/Hulu/Disney+)
Wednesday’s scoreboard
Toronto Maple Leafs 4, Tampa Bay Lightning 3 (OT)
Philadelphia Flyers 8, New York Rangers 5
Minnesota Wild 8, San Jose Sharks 7 (OT)
Edmonton Oilers 4, St. Louis Blues 3
Anaheim Ducks 4, Calgary Flames 3 (OT)
Expanded standings
Atlantic Division
Points: 100
Regulation wins: 39
Playoff position: A1
Games left: 4
Points pace: 105.1
Next game: vs. MTL (Saturday)
Playoff chances: 100%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 97
Regulation wins: 39
Playoff position: A2
Games left: 4
Points pace: 102.0
Next game: vs. DET (Friday)
Playoff chances: 100%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 94
Regulation wins: 36
Playoff position: A3
Games left: 4
Points pace: 98.8
Next game: vs. DET (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 100%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 90
Regulation wins: 33
Playoff position: WC1
Games left: 4
Points pace: 94.6
Next game: vs. MTL (Friday)
Playoff chances: 99.9%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 87
Regulation wins: 29
Playoff position: WC2
Games left: 4
Points pace: 91.5
Next game: @ OTT (Friday)
Playoff chances: 97.7%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 79
Regulation wins: 28
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 5
Points pace: 84.1
Next game: @ FLA (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 0.4%
Tragic number: 3
Points: 76
Regulation wins: 28
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 5
Points pace: 80.9
Next game: @ CBJ (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 0%
Tragic number: E
Points: 73
Regulation wins: 25
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 3
Points pace: 75.8
Next game: vs. CHI (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 0%
Tragic number: E
Metro Division
Points: 107
Regulation wins: 42
Playoff position: M1
Games left: 5
Points pace: 114.0
Next game: vs. CAR (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 100%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 96
Regulation wins: 41
Playoff position: M2
Games left: 5
Points pace: 102.2
Next game: @ WSH (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 100%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 89
Regulation wins: 36
Playoff position: M3
Games left: 4
Points pace: 93.6
Next game: vs. PIT (Friday)
Playoff chances: 99.9%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 79
Regulation wins: 27
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 5
Points pace: 84.1
Next game: vs. NYR (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 0.8%
Tragic number: 3
Points: 79
Regulation wins: 25
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 5
Points pace: 84.1
Next game: vs. BUF (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 0.3%
Tragic number: 3
Points: 79
Regulation wins: 32
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 4
Points pace: 83.1
Next game: @ NYI (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 0.7%
Tragic number: 1
Points: 76
Regulation wins: 22
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 3
Points pace: 78.9
Next game: @ NJ (Friday)
Playoff chances: 0%
Tragic number: E
Points: 73
Regulation wins: 21
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 4
Points pace: 76.7
Next game: vs. NYI (Saturday)
Playoff chances: 0%
Tragic number: E
Central Division
Points: 110
Regulation wins: 42
Playoff position: C1
Games left: 4
Points pace: 115.6
Next game: @ DAL (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 100%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 106
Regulation wins: 41
Playoff position: C2
Games left: 4
Points pace: 111.4
Next game: vs. WPG (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 100%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 100
Regulation wins: 39
Playoff position: C3
Games left: 3
Points pace: 103.8
Next game: vs. VAN (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 100%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 93
Regulation wins: 33
Playoff position: WC1
Games left: 3
Points pace: 96.5
Next game: @ CGY (Friday)
Playoff chances: 91.8%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 93
Regulation wins: 31
Playoff position: WC2
Games left: 2
Points pace: 95.3
Next game: @ SEA (Saturday)
Playoff chances: 97.2%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 84
Regulation wins: 28
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 4
Points pace: 88.3
Next game: vs. NSH (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 0%
Tragic number: E
Points: 64
Regulation wins: 23
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 4
Points pace: 67.3
Next game: @ UTA (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 0%
Tragic number: E
Points: 54
Regulation wins: 19
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 4
Points pace: 56.8
Next game: @ BOS (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 0%
Tragic number: E
Pacific Division
Points: 103
Regulation wins: 43
Playoff position: P1
Games left: 4
Points pace: 108.3
Next game: vs. SEA (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 100%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 97
Regulation wins: 39
Playoff position: P3
Games left: 5
Points pace: 103.3
Next game: vs. ANA (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 100%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 95
Regulation wins: 33
Playoff position: P2
Games left: 4
Points pace: 99.9
Next game: vs. SJ (Friday)
Playoff chances: 99.6%
Tragic number: N/A
Points: 88
Regulation wins: 28
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 4
Points pace: 92.5
Next game: vs. MIN (Friday)
Playoff chances: 11.3%
Tragic number: 4
Points: 85
Regulation wins: 27
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 4
Points pace: 89.4
Next game: @ COL (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 0%
Tragic number: E
Points: 78
Regulation wins: 24
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 4
Points pace: 82.0
Next game: @ LA (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 0%
Tragic number: E
Points: 74
Regulation wins: 28
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 3
Points pace: 76.8
Next game: @ VGK (Thursday)
Playoff chances: 0%
Tragic number: E
Points: 51
Regulation wins: 14
Playoff position: N/A
Games left: 4
Points pace: 53.6
Next game: @ EDM (Friday)
Playoff chances: 0%
Tragic number: E
Note: A “y” means that the team has clinched the division title. An “x” means that the team has clinched a playoff berth. An “e” means that the team has been eliminated from playoff contention.
Race for the No. 1 pick
The NHL uses a draft lottery to determine the order of the first round, so the team that finishes in last place is not guaranteed the No. 1 selection. As of 2021, a team can move up a maximum of 10 spots if it wins the lottery, so only 11 teams are eligible for the No. 1 pick. Full details on the process are here. Matthew Schaefer, a defenseman for the OHL’s Erie Otters, is No. 1 on the draft board.
Points: 51
Regulation wins: 14
Points: 54
Regulation wins: 19
Points: 64
Regulation wins: 23
Points: 73
Regulation wins: 25
Points: 73
Regulation wins: 21
Points: 74
Regulation wins: 28
Points: 76
Regulation wins: 22
Points: 76
Regulation wins: 28
Points: 78
Regulation wins: 24
Points: 79
Regulation wins: 32
Points: 79
Regulation wins: 25
Points: 79
Regulation wins: 27
Points: 79
Regulation wins: 28
Points: 84
Regulation wins: 28
Points: 85
Regulation wins: 27
Points: 88
Regulation wins: 28
There were plenty of goals scored in the NHL on Wednesday night, and four players accounted for a bulk of them.
Minnesota’s Joel Eriksson Ek and San Jose’s Macklin Celebrini traded hat tricks in one contest, and Toronto’s Matthew Knies and Philadelphia’s Tyson Foerster also had three-goal games. The four three-goal efforts in the first three games of the five-game schedule were the most in the NHL since five hat tricks on April 1, 2023.
In the highest scoring game of the night, Eriksson Ek had a career-high four goals in his return from a lower-body injury in the Wild’s 8-7 overtime victory over the Sharks. San Jose was led by Celebrini, a rookie star who finished with three goals and two assists.
Knies had his second hat trick of the season for the Maple Leafs in a 4-3 victory over the Tampa Bay Lightning. Foerster posted his first NHL hat trick for the Flyers in an 8-5 win over the New York Rangers.
The NHL had three three-hat trick days this season on Dec. 12, Dec. 27, Jan. 8 and April 5.
Having clinched a playoff berth for the first time since 2017 on Tuesday, the Ottawa Senators are considering holding out injured captain Brady Tkachuk for the final four regular-season games.
Tkachuk, 25, has missed the past five games with an upper-body injury suffered on a hit from Pittsburgh defenseman Ryan Graves in the host Penguins’ 1-0 overtime victory on March 30.
Senators general manager Steve Staios said Wednesday that Tkachuk might play if the playoffs started Thursday, but he couldn’t give a definitive answer.
“[Tkachuk] continues to progress,” said Staios, also the team’s president of hockey operations. “Now that we’ve clinched a playoff spot, I think every team goes through these discussions. Like, what is the best situation? Do you rest players? How do you manage that? We haven’t figured that part out yet, but to me, you always want to keep the team moving along and competing at a high level to roll into the playoffs at the right time. But certainly, those will be discussions that we’ll have, as far as lineup for the last four games.”
Tkachuk has a team highs with 29 goals and 123 penalty minutes, as well as 26 assists, a plus-2 rating, 33 blocks and 227 hits in 71 games.
The Senators (42-30-6, 90 points) have the first wild-card berth in the Eastern Conference. Their regular-season schedule continues Friday with a visit from the Montreal Canadiens, followed by home games against Philadelphia on Sunday, Chicago on Tuesday and Carolina on April 17.
Ottawa selected Tkachuk with the fourth overall pick of the 2018 NHL Draft, a year after the Senators lost to the Penguins in the conference finals. He made his NHL debut in 2018 and has 191 goals, 404 points, 750 penalty minutes, 193 blocks and 1,758 hits in 511 regular-season games.
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