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Remember when that composer at the coronation had to come out and say he wasn’t Meghan Markle in disguise?

Well, 2023 was full of hilarious, jaw-dropping and laugh-out-loud moments just like that.

We’ve rounded up some of our favourites.

Harry’s virginity

A person holds a copy of the newly released autobiography from the Duke of Sussex, titled Spare, at Waterstones Piccadilly, London, as it goes on sale to the public for the fist time. Picture date: Tuesday January 10, 2023.

Prince Harry really did tell all in his tell-all memoir which was released in January.

While there were several note-worthy revelations (the Nazi costume apparently not being all his fault, “Willy” calling Meghan “rude” and the brothers getting into fisticuffs – resulting in Harry falling on to the dog bowl), the one that gave rise to countless memes and re-enactments using a snippet from the audiobook was the prince describing how he lost his virginity in a field to an “older lady”.

In case you missed it (unlikely), here’s that passage:

“I mounted her quickly, after which she spanked my ass and held me back… one of my mistakes was letting it happen in a field, just behind a busy pub.

“No doubt someone had seen us.”

Good evening Daddy

Live TV is hard.

You can misspeak or lose your train of thought, or accidentally stick your middle finger up at millions of viewers dunking biscuits into their tea (more on that one later).

Sometimes, you might even call a guest daddy, just like our very own Mark Austin did when he was talking to policing commentator Danny Shaw (you understand the mix-up) about alleged escaped terror suspect Daniel Khalife.

The King gets bored at his own party

2022 gave us the King and the leaky pen, but 2023 gave us the King complaining in his golden carriage about how bored he was at his coronation.

He was filmed waiting outside Westminster Abbey for the rest of his family who were running late.

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King looks grumpy after arriving early

This is what a lip reader thinks he was saying:

“We can never be on time… This is a negative… There’s always something… This is boring.”

Victoria Beckham is ‘working class’

How did Victoria Beckham – a woman who made a name for herself as a posh person – think she could get away with telling the world that she came from humble beginnings?

In the greatly anticipated Beckham documentary on Netflix, the Spice Girl began to talk about how she and husband David were such a good match because of their very similar “working class” backgrounds, when he swiftly reminded her that you’re not very “working class” if your dad took you to school in a Rolls-Royce.

She took it in good humour and even launched a T-shirt to celebrate the moment.

Taylor Swift puts Travis Kelce ‘on the map’

2023 saw Taylor Swift find romance with a superstar American football player – but nobody had really heard of him before Swift made him famous, right?

That’s what women on social media all over the US were teasing their boyfriends/husbands/dads/brothers with after the megastar was pictured at one of his games.

Taylor Swift, center left, celebrates with Brittany Mahomes, center right, after the Kansas City Chiefs scored a touchdown during the first half of an NFL football game against the New England Patriots, Sunday, Dec. 17, 2023, in Foxborough, Mass. (AP Photo/Charles Krupa)
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Taylor Swift celebrates with Brittany Mahomes at a Kansas City Chiefs game on 17 December

If you missed the trend, the videos followed pretty much exactly the same format:

Girl: Isn’t it so good that this Travis Kelce guy is gonna have such a good career now that Taylor Swift has put him on the map?

Guy: Put him on the map?

Girl: Yeah, like she’s totally made him famous.

Guy: You’re kidding right? You’re kidding.

Girl: No, he’s going to be so famous now, it’s great, right?

Guy: Travis Kelce is the best tight-end in literally the entire world. He’s one of the most famous football players in the NFL.

Travis Kelce has opened up about his relationship with Taylor Swift
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Travis Kelce is dating Taylor Swift

‘I’m not Meghan, I’m a composer’

Sir Karl Jenkins is a Welsh composer.

He is not Meghan Markle in disguise and he’s had that moustache since he was 18.

Sir Karl Jenkins and Meghan Markle
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Sir Karl Jenkins and Meghan Markle

The 79-year-old musician, who was sitting next to Andrew Lloyd Webber in Westminster Abbey for the King’s coronation, sparked speculation on social media that he was the duchess undercover in a large white wig and glasses.

After having had enough of the rumours that suggested otherwise, he released a video statement.

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Sir Karl Jenkins: ‘I’m not Meghan’

“My name is Sir Karl Jenkins. I understand there’s been a lot of interest in me since I appeared at the coronation of King Charles III. I was there because I’d written some music for the service.

“I was quite surprised that some people thought I was Meghan Markle in disguise. Someone wrote I was there to steal the crown jewels.

“I look this way all the time. I’ve had this moustache since I was 18. So that’s me. Nothing sinister about it or surprising at all.”

Bad blood between Biden and Taylor?

Oh, President Biden.

You can rattle Trump supporters and gun enthusiasts all you want, but antagonising the Swifties is career suicide.

The American president has been known for the odd blunder here and there, but he really stuck his foot in it when he used the name Britney in an apparent reference to Taylor Swift’s most recent overseas tour.

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Biden confuses Taylor Swift with Britney Spears

Sex noises disrupt Euro 2024 draw

Moaning could be heard at one of the biggest football events of the year – and it wasn’t Gary Neville talking about Manchester United’s woes!

It was actually sexual noises being played during UEFA’s live draw, causing a stir on social media.

There were smirks in the audience as the sound of a woman moaning interrupted proceedings for several minutes.

Serial prankster Daniel Jarvis later owned up to playing out the sound – and he had previously taken credit for a similar incident during live BBC coverage of a game between Wolverhampton and Liverpool.

BBC presenter flips the bird

Five, four, three, two, one… aaand viral phenomenon.

When BBC News presenter Maryam Moshiri began her crude countdown to going on air, she had no idea she’d be giving the middle finger to the nation as well as to her studio colleagues.

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Maryam Moshiri says gesture was ‘private joke’

The joke was mostly well-received all round, and the footage that has since been released of her full sarcastic countdown from five has also been a hit on social media.

It was the Tories who faced the most backlash in the video’s aftermath, after their social media team posted a screenshot of the presenter holding up her finger on X with the words: “Labour when you ask for their plans to tackle illegal migration.”

Never mind the bullocks

A bullock went viral when it was pulled from a sinkhole with “a couple of straps and a telehandler”.

The most miraculous thing about the whole incident – which was a bit like watching a blown-up version of a rabbit getting pulled from a hat – was that the animal walked away unharmed, as if nothing had ever happened.

The video of the bullock’s ordeal has been viewed 62 million times on Sky News’ platforms.

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Bullock gets pulled out of a hole by its back legs

Right in the pie hole

The budget airline’s boss got a full face of dessert when a protester decided to throw two cream pies at him.

Michael O’Leary, to his credit, didn’t come across all pie and mighty (sorry) after the incident at a news conference, in which the female protester demanded he “stop the pollution of your planes”.

“It’s the first time environmentalists have given me cake,” he quipped.

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Moment Ryanair CEO is hit with a cake by climate activists

Sir Keir Starmer gets glitter bombed

Unfortunately for Sir Keir Starmer, it wasn’t his vibrant personality and energy that lit up the Labour conference in October, according to some critics.

It was instead the glitter that had been sprinkled over his head by a protester who made his way on to the stage during the Labour leader’s speech.

The demonstrator shouted “true democracy is citizen-led, politics needs an update” – prompting boos and looks of concern from members of the audience.

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The protester was carried out by security guards

Sir Keir managed to brush it off… figuratively. Literally speaking, large specks of glitter could still be seen on his white shirt and remained there for the duration of his keynote address.

‘X, formerly known as Twitter’

Yes; we’re as fed up of writing it as you are of reading it.

But we have to keep the line in for our one reader who may not know that the social media site was rebranded in July by its billionaire owner Elon Musk.

Perhaps next year, we’ll start referring to X (formerly Twitter!) as just X. Watch this space(X).

Musk and Zuckerberg almost had a fight

Elon Musk challenged Mark Zuckerberg to a cage fight – only for the Meta boss to unexpectedly agree to it.

The pair bickered back-and-fourth online for months, proving that you’re never too rich or famous to be an internet troll.

Both men are preparing for their bouts... Pics: Instagram/Zuck and X/ElonMusk
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Both men said they were preparing for the fight. Pics: Instagram/Zuck and X/ElonMusk

The idea ultimately fizzled out, though, with the social media moguls failing to even agree on a date for the potential bout.

Meta boss Zuckerberg has since told us that it’s time to “move on” from the saga.

Never, Mark. Never.

Gwyneth Paltrow and the ski accident

“Who caused the crash? Is somebody lying? What did she just say to him?”

These were the kinds of questions we had in March as we watched actress Gwyneth Paltrow defend herself in – and ultimately win – a bizarre civil court case against a man who claimed she crashed into him while skiing.

It took jurors all of two hours to reflect on eight days of evidence and conclude that optometrist Terry Sanderson was “100%” at fault for the skiing accident in 2016.

But viewers watching the final court broadcast were still left with questions as the Seven star leaned into Mr Sanderson and said something to him that wasn’t picked up by microphones.

Mr Sanderson claimed that she simply wished the 76-year-old well, but we’ll never truly know.

Perhaps the creators of a new play based on the court case (yes, that’s really a thing) will give their own interpretation of the exchange.

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‘The ridiculousness of it just made it so captivating’

Altman’s out… wait, he’s back!

In a whirlwind few days for ChatGPT maker OpenAI, chief executive Sam Altman was ousted by his own board, only to be reinstated within a week.

Not being “consistently candid in his communications” was the charge laid at his feet by the board when the stunning decision was made mid-November.

Sam Altman at a summit in November
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Sam Altman at a summit in November

But his alleged comms shortcomings were swiftly forgiven by the AI firm after its president and other staff members threatened to follow Altman out.

It was enough to see Altman hastily return as chief executive – with a new board installed.

Education secretary complains ‘everyone else has sat on their arses’

The education secretary was caught complaining about not being thanked for doing a “f****** good job” over the unsafe concrete crisis.

After an interview with ITV News in Westminster, Gillian Keegan criticised others for being “sat on their arses” and claimed the government had gone “over and above” in addressing concerns relating to reinforced autoclaved aerated concrete (RAAC).

While her mic was still on, she said: “Does anyone ever say ‘You know you’ve done a f****** good job because everyone else has sat on their arses and done nothing’?

“No signs of that, no?”

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Education sec watches clip of herself swearing

Ms Keegan later apologised and admitted she was “frustrated with the interviewer” who was “making out it was all my fault”.

If we’re grateful for anything, it’s that the rant was caught on mic.

James Cleverly: ‘I said s***, not s***hole!’

Are you sensing a theme here?

When Commons microphones picked up some foul language during Prime Minister’s Questions in November, Home Secretary James Cleverly was forced to issue an apology.

It was him, he admitted, who could be heard using the S word following a question from Labour Stockton North MP Alex Cunningham regarding child poverty in the northern town.

Mr Cunningham accused Suella Braverman’s successor of describing Stockton-on-Tees as a “s***hole” in the remark, but Mr Cleverly was adamant that he “would never” insult the town.

Insult its MP, though? Well, that’s another story.

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Rude remark heard during PMQs

A source close to the home secretary admitted the minister had used “unparliamentary language” – though added it wasn’t directed at the town.

The source told Sky News: “James made a comment. He called Alex Cunningham a s*** MP. He apologises for unparliamentary language.”

Activists climb on to prime minister’s roof

Environmental activists decided to force Rishi Sunak into action by sitting on his roof with “no new oil” banners while he was on holiday with his family in California.

The Greenpeace five were later bailed by North Yorkshire Police after scaling the Yorkshire manor and draping it in a black-oil fabric.

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‘I’m on the roof of the prime minister’s house’

Number 10 stood by its policy in the wake of the controversy, saying drilling for more oil will boost energy security and reduce bills for consumers.

While the outing seemingly had little impact on the government’s policies, the protesters can say they spent an entire August morning on the prime minister’s house.

Cockroach steals the show at Met Gala

A cockroach became an overnight sensation when it attended the prestigious Met Gala in New York.

The insect initially evaded a photographer’s best efforts to kill it, but people on social media were forced to mourn after fate eventually caught up with the roach.

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A cockroach is spotted at the Met Gala.

The Pope’s wearing a puffer?

All of us – even the biggest advocates for technological advancement – have probably seen things in AI’s rapid rise this year that have raised concerns.

Now even the Pope himself has spoken out, saying there needs to be regulation to tackle the disinformation, discrimination and distortion that AI can contribute to.

What were these incredibly strong words brought on by?

Quite possibly by an AI-generated image of the pontiff wearing a rather stylish, oversized coat.

Michael Owen’s apple throwing antics

A teenage World Cup star and a Ballon d’Or winner aged 22 – but how did England striker Michael Owen achieve such astounding heights?

Well, it all stemmed from throwing apple cores into bins.

Owen became an internet meme – and not for the first time – when he went on a podcast and explained how “everything was a challenge” to him growing up.

“You know I would eat an apple while watching the TV at night,” he said on Upfront With Simon Jordan.

“The bin would be by the TV, six metres away or whatever. I would just do it. I had the bravery to miss and for there to be a stain on the wallpaper and my mum to absolutely scream at me and send me upstairs.”

Luckily the striker’s pinpoint finishing translated to apple throwing as he told of his pride that his mother never got to shout at him for staining the walls – because he simply never missed. He said it earned him the respect that he craved from his father.

Never change, Michael.

2023, it’s been a blast. What will 2024 bring? If this year’s taught us anything, it’s that there’s no point in making predictions.

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Police separate anti-immigration and anti-racism protesters across the country

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Police separate anti-immigration and anti-racism protesters across the country

Protesters have gathered across the country as groups demonstrated against asylum seeker housing and were met by anti-racism campaigners.

Demonstrations under the Abolish Asylum System slogan were held in England, Scotland and Wales, including in Bristol, Exeter, Tamworth, Cannock, Aberdeen, Mold, Perth, Nuneaton, Liverpool, Wakefield, Newcastle, Horley and Canary Wharf.

Counter-protests were also organised by campaign group Stand Up to Racism.

Police officers scuffle with demonstrators during protests at Castle Park in Bristol. Pic: PA
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Police officers scuffle with demonstrators during protests at Castle Park in Bristol. Pic: PA

In Bristol, mounted police separated the two groups in the Castle Park, with officers scuffling with protesters.

Police kept around 200 anti-immigration protesters draped in English flags away from roughly 50 Stand Up to Racism protesters in Horley, Surrey.

People take part in a protest outside the Sheraton Four Points Hotel in Horley, Surrey. Pic: PA
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People take part in a protest outside the Sheraton Four Points Hotel in Horley, Surrey. Pic: PA

One man, wearing a West Ham United football shirt, was held by police as he yelled: “You’re not welcome here, you’re not welcome here, you’re not welcome here” at anti-racism protesters.

Read more:
Who says what on asylum hotels
18 councils pursuing or considering legal action to block asylum hotels
Migration stats going in the wrong direction
Labour may have walked into political trap over Epping hotel

More on Migrant Crossings

Anti-immigration protesters also chanted: “Tommy, Tommy, Tommy, Tommy Robinson” in support of the far-right activist, whose real name is Stephen Yaxley-Lennon.

A confrontation between a protester and a counter-protester outside the Sheraton Four Points Hotel in Horley, Surrey. Pic: PA
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A confrontation between a protester and a counter-protester outside the Sheraton Four Points Hotel in Horley, Surrey. Pic: PA

The anti-racism protesters chanted “say it loud, say it clear, refugees are welcome here” and held signs calling for solidarity and to “stop deportations”.

The Stand Up to Racism protesters were shepherded into a smaller area as they continued to chant: “No hate, no fear, refugees are welcome here”, which was met with “No they’re f****** not” from the other side of the street.

People inside the hotel look at protesters outside the Radisson Hotel in Perth. Pic: PA
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People inside the hotel look at protesters outside the Radisson Hotel in Perth. Pic: PA

In Perth, protesters gathered outside the Radisson Hotel.

The anti-migration protesters held up signs with slogans such as “Perth is full – empty the hotels” and “get them out”.

People take part in a counter-protest outside the Radisson Hotel in Perth. Pic: PA
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People take part in a counter-protest outside the Radisson Hotel in Perth. Pic: PA

Stand Up to Racism Scotland said it had achieved “victory” in Perth, with more than 200 gathering to oppose the Abolish Asylum System demonstration.

In Liverpool, a dispersal order was issued to try and contain the protests.

Saturday’s events come amid continued tension around the use of the hotels for asylum seekers.

Regular protests had been held outside the Bell Hotel in Epping, Essex, which started after an asylum seeker housed there was charged with sexually assaulting a 14-year-old girl on 10 July.

Hadush Gerberslasie Kebatu, 38, was charged with trying to kiss a teenage girl and denies the allegations. He is due to stand trial later this month.

In the wake of those protests, Epping Forest District Council sought and won an interim High Court injunction to stop migrants from being accommodated there – a decision which the government is seeking permission to appeal.

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Reform UK’s new immigration plans would’ve been extreme just a few years ago

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Reform UK's new immigration plans would've been extreme just a few years ago

Mass deportations. Prison camps. Quitting the Refugee Convention and the UN Convention on Torture.

A shrug of the shoulders at the idea of the UK sending asylum seekers back to places like Afghanistan or Eritrea, where they could be tortured or executed.

“I’m really sorry, but we can’t be responsible for everything that happens in the whole of the world,” says Nigel Farage.

“Who is our priority?”

The Reform UK leader has been setting out his party’s new plans to address illegal migration in an interview with The Times newspaper – a set of policies, and a use of language, which would surely have been seen as extreme just a few years ago.

Only last autumn the Reform leader repeatedly shied away from the concept of “mass deportations”, describing the idea as “a political impossibility”.

But now he’s embraced Trump-style immigration rhetoric.

More on Asylum

It’s not surprising that Reform want to capitalise on the outpouring of public anger over the use of hotels to house asylum seekers. The policy was started by the previous Conservative government, in response to housing shortages – and Labour has failed to make significant progress on its promise to stop it.

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Asylum hotel protests set to rise

But all the major parties have shifted firmly to the right on this issue.

There’s been very little political criticism of the aggressiveness of Farage’s policy suggestions, and the premise that the UK should no longer offer sanctuary to anyone who arrives here illegally.

The Tory response has been to complain that he’s just copying the ideas they didn’t quite get round to implementing before calling the general election.

“Four months late, this big reveal is just recycling many ideas the Conservatives have already announced,” said Chris Philp MP, the shadow home secretary.

“Labour’s border crisis does urgently need to be fixed with tough and radical measures, but only the Conservatives have done – and will continue to do – the detailed work to deliver a credible plan that will actually work in practice.”

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Certainly, the ambition to arrest and deport everyone who arrives in a small boat – regardless of whether or not they have legitimate grounds for asylum – has clear echoes of the Tories’ Rwanda policy.

Despite spending £700m on the controversial idea, only four volunteers were ever sent to Kigali before it was cancelled by Sir Keir Starmer, who branded it a gimmick.

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Reform putting ‘wheels in motion’ for migrant hotel legal challenges

Labour have suggested they’ve diverted Home Office resources that were freed up by that decision into processing asylum claims more quickly and increasing deportations.

They’re hoping tougher action against the criminal gangs and the new “one in one out” deal with France will help deter the number of people crossing the Channel in small boats in the first place, currently at record levels.

But rather than offering any defence of the principle of offering asylum to genuine refugees – Labour’s Angela Eagle MP, the border security minister, has also focused on the feasibility of Farage’s policies.

“Nigel Farage is simply plucking numbers out of the air, another pie in the sky policy from a party that will say anything for a headline,” she said.

“We are getting a grip of the broken asylum system. Making sure those with no right to be here are removed or deported.”

Even the Liberal Democrats have taken a similar approach.

“This plan sums up Nigel Farage perfectly, as like him it doesn’t offer any real solutions,” they said.

“Whilst Farage continues to stoke division, we Liberal Democrats are more interested in delivering for our local communities.”

It’s been left to the Refugee Council to defend the principle of asylum.

“After the horrors of the Second World War, Britain and its allies committed to protecting those fleeing persecution,” said CEO Enver Solomon.

“The Refugee Convention was our collective vow of ‘never again’ – a legal framework ensuring that people who come to our country seeking safety get a fair chance to apply for asylum.

“That commitment remains vital today. Whether escaping conflict in Sudan or repression under regimes like the Taliban, people still need protection.

“Most find refuge in neighbouring countries. But some will seek sanctuary in Europe, including Britain.

“We can meet this challenge by upholding a fair, managed system that determines who qualifies for protection and who does not.”

But with Reform leading in the polls, and protests outside hotels across the country – politicians of all stripes are under pressure to respond to public frustration over the issue.

A recent YouGov poll found half of voters now believe immigration over the last ten years has been mostly bad for the country – double the figure just three years ago.

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While the government has made some progress in reducing the cost of asylum hotels – down from £8.3m a day in 2023/4 to £5.77m a day in 2024/5 – the overall numbers accommodated in this way have gone up by 8% since Labour took charge, thanks to the surge in new claims.

Sir Keir has previously said he won’t make a promise he can’t keep.

But current efforts to end the use of asylum hotels by 2029 are clearly not working.

That’s a credibility gap Farage is more than ready to exploit.

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Three people in a life-threatening condition after ‘arson attack’ at restaurant

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Three people in a life-threatening condition after 'arson attack' at restaurant

Three people are in a life-threatening condition after a suspected arson attack at a restaurant in Ilford, say police.

Five people – three women and two men – were injured in the fire, which broke out shortly after 9pm on Friday at Indian Aroma on Woodford Avenue, Gants Hill.

No arrests have been made.

Hospital porter Edward Thawe, 43, went to help with his son after hearing screams from his nearby home.

Woodford Avenue from above. Pic: UK News and Pictures
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Woodford Avenue from above. Pic: UK News and Pictures

He described the scene as “horrible” and “more than scary and the sort of thing that you don’t want to look at twice”.

He said: “I heard screaming and people saying they had called the police.”

He said he saw a woman and a severely burned man who may have been customers.

More on Metropolitan Police

He said the man’s “whole body was burnt”, including his shirt, but he was still wearing his trousers.

After being treated at the scene by paramedics from the London Ambulance Service, the victims were taken to hospital.

Indian Aroma in Ilford after the fire. Pic: UK News and Pictures
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Indian Aroma in Ilford after the fire. Pic: UK News and Pictures

Nine others were able to get out beforehand, London Fire Brigade (LFB) said in a statement.

“The brigade’s control officers received seven calls about the fire and mobilised crews from Ilford, Hainault, Leytonstone and Woodford fire stations to the scene. The fire was extinguished by 10.32pm,” said an LFB spokesperson.

“We understand this incident will cause concern within the community. My team of specialist detectives are working at speed to piece the incident together,” said Detective Chief Inspector Mark Rogers, of the Met’s Central Specialist Crime North unit.

“Locals can expect to see a large police presence in the area. If you have any concerns, please speak to those officers on the ground.”

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The London Ambulance Service told Sky News: “We sent resources to the scene, including ambulance crews, an advanced paramedic, an incident response officer and paramedics from our hazardous area response team.

Indian Aroma in Ilford after the fire. Pic: UK News and Pictures
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Indian Aroma in Ilford after the fire. Pic: UK News and Pictures

“We treated five people for burns and smoke inhalation. We took two patients to a major trauma centre and three others to local hospitals.”

Health secretary Wes Streeting, who is the MP for Ilford North, posted on X to thank the emergency services for their response to the fire.

He also asked his constituents to “please avoid the area for now”.

Anyone with information is urged to contact the Met via 101, quoting 7559/22AUG. If you wish to remain anonymous, please speak with Crimestoppers on 0800 555 111.

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