Sweet Bobby catfish victim Kirat Assi on taking her pain to the screen

Published

6 months ago

October 13, 2024

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The latest true crime documentary to hit our screens is described as “a fairytale romance gone horribly wrong”. It labels itself “one crazy story” in its opening scene.

But while Sweet Bobby: My Catfish Nightmare is a true story, the near-decade of deception, manipulation and coercion it depicts isn’t a crime.

Catfishing – the name given to using fake online profiles to trick others into believing they are in a relationship – is not illegal in the UK.

Kirat Assi, the subject of Netflix‘s Sweet Bobby documentary tells Sky News: “People say, ‘How can you be so stupid?’ That’s the constant question you get. But none of us [victims] are stupid. It’s just the perpetrator’s gone the extra mile.”

Thought to be the UK’s longest-known catfishing scam, it’s the story of Kirat, an events assistant and radio presenter, who was deceived into believing she was in an online relationship with a cardiologist called Dr Bobby Jandu between 2009 and 2018.

Using the identity of a real person who Kirat had once briefly met, the perpetrator spent years building up the fake friendship, with the relationship becoming romantic from late 2015. They even became engaged.

But nothing was what it seemed, and every interaction – with around 60 people in total across multiple social platforms – was all one of Kirat’s distant relatives.

Kirat admits she wasn’t keen for the first telling of the story via Tortoise Media’s podcast of the same name in 2021, let alone the documentary it’s now inspired.

So why is she allowing it to be shared with the world via the world’s largest streaming platform?

Now 44, Kirat says: “At the moment of her confession, I was screaming, ‘Why?’ But I’ve long ago let go of that… There’s just no reason to have done what she did. Now, I just need to know how she did it.”

How unlucky can one person be?

The documentary sets out how, during Kirat’s relationship with Bobby, he was shot six times in Kenya; put into witness protection in New York; suffered a stroke, brain tumour and heart attack; and fathered a secret child.

But while Kirat concedes she found it “strange,” “a bit weird,” and even asked herself “How unlucky can one person be?”, a circle of Bobby’s friends and family always validated the events in his life across numerous forms of social media.

The couple would Skype call all night and share voice notes and messages constantly.

Kirat is at pains to say it wasn’t a 10-year romance, and that initially she baulked at the idea due to their friendship being firmly in the “bro-zone”. But after years of persuasion, she says she finally gave in and they became a couple.

‘My life was hellish’

Towards the end of the relationship, Kirat says Bobby became controlling, accusing her of flirting with other men, and discouraging her from going to work or seeing friends and family.

She says that’s when things took a turn for the worse: “I started to lose weight… It was coercive control, to a point where you’re thoroughly being abused, where you don’t have any sense of yourself left anymore. And you’re just scared all the time”.

That’s when she hired a private detective, confronting the real-life Bobby on the doorstep of his family home in Brighton.

Kirat says: “I was just trying to find out the truth in that last period, but at the same time trying to keep the peace and not rock the boat because my life would be made hell. And it was hellish enough already.”

‘Victim shaming is dangerous’

Despite reporting it to police in 2018, no charge has ever been filed. The Met Police confirmed to Sky News that the case was closed in 2019 but has since been re-opened for reinvestigation.

A 2020 civil action, believed to be the UK’s first successful claim of its kind relating to catfishing – resulted in a private apology and substantial payout the following year.

Kirat hopes the documentary will inspire other victims of catfishing to speak out.

“There’s so much online abuse and bullying. There’s so much victim shaming, which stops people from speaking up… all of us have been suffering in silence.”

She says she’s received vicious abuse and trolling online since the podcast was released in 2021.

Kirat’s relative declined to be interviewed for the film, but her representatives told documentary producers: “This matter involves events that began when she was a schoolgirl. She considers it a private matter and strongly objects to what she describes as ‘numerous unfounded and damaging accusations'”.

‘I dare not speak for her’

She’s not seen her relative since the day she came to her home to confess the deception.

She admits she “dare not speak for her,” adding that there’s still fear in her close-knit London Sikh community about speaking out .

“I guess people are still scared of what she might do, even if the case is open. [People are afraid] because of the non-action from the police, the slow action from the police, the limited actions from the civil case. People just don’t have the faith that it’s been dealt with in order for them to speak up.”

But Kirat refuses to be silenced: “The person that did it needs to be held accountable. I can’t bear the brunt of being blamed for bringing it out in the open. I’ve had to do what’s right for me,

‘People expect me to be a whimpering wreck’

Six years after her world fell apart, Kirat’s dating again.

She says she’s back to her “old fiery self”, admitting, when people realize who she is, they “have the shock of their life because they expect me to be a whimpering wreck”.

But parts of her life are still disrupted: “I have to be very careful about what I do and how I do it, who’s Googling me when it comes to work things.”

And with technology at our fingertips 24/7, Kirat has a word of warning: “It’s becoming easier to do it. The crazy things that AI and online can do now are just getting worse. I feel like I’ve had a lucky escape that it didn’t happen to me now.”

Sweet Bobby: My Catfish Nightmare is streaming on Netflix from Wednesday 16 October.

Entertainment

Olivier Awards: US actor says ‘special relationship firmly intact’ despite Trump’s tariffs

Published

3 hours ago

April 7, 2025

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Olivier Awards: US actor says 'special relationship firmly intact' despite Trump's tariffs

British star Lesley Manville and American actor John Lithgow have won the acting categories at this year’s Olivier Awards, which recognise excellence in London theatre.

Lithgow, 79, played Roald Dahl in Giant, which is about the children’s author wondering whether to make a public apology.

While accepting his award he appeared to reference the current controversy over Donald Trump’s second term as US president.

The Conclave star quipped: “It’s not always easy to welcome an American into your midst, and at this particular moment, it’s probably a little more complicated than usual.”

He also told the audience at the Royal Albert Hall that the “special relationship is still firmly intact”, despite Mr Trump imposing tariffs on British exports to the US.

His co-star, English actor Elliot Levey, took best actor in a supporting role.

Giant was also named best new play.

Manville, 69, was honoured for her performance in the Greek tragedy Oedipus at the Wyndham’s Theatre.

She said she felt “emotional” while accepting her statuette because it was a production she had “felt very strongly about being” in.

Manville, who played Princess Margaret in The Crown, added that she was taking an early flight to Dublin on Monday to do some filming, and would not be getting “much sleep tonight”.

Best actress in a supporting role went to Romola Garai for her performance in The Years, based on a memoir by French writer Annie Ernaux.

Garai, whose film credits include Scoop and Atonement, was nominated in the same category for Giant.

Dame Imelda Staunton won a fifth Olivier, for best actress in a musical for the London revival of classic musical Hello, Dolly!

The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button won best new musical, a best actor musical award for Lark Rise To Candleford actor John Dagleish, and the outstanding musical contribution award.

The annual event was co-hosted by British singer Beverley Knight and Pose star Billy Porter.

Entertainment

Pete Townshend’s Quadrophenia talked about modern masculinity before Gen Z was born

Published

2 days ago

April 5, 2025

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Pete Townshend's Quadrophenia talked about modern masculinity before Gen Z was born

Despite The Who’s Quadrophenia being set over 60 years ago, Pete Townshend’s themes of identity, mental health, and modern masculinity are just as relevant today.

The album is having a renaissance as Pete Townshend’s Quadrophenia A Mod ballet is being brought to life via dance at Sadler’s Wells East, and Sky News has an exclusive first look.

As Townshend puts it, the album he wrote is “perfect” for the stage.

“My wife Rachel did the orchestration for me, and as soon as I heard it I said to her it would make a fabulous ballet and we never really let that go,” he tells Sky News.

“Heavy percussion, concussive sequences. They’re explosive moments. They’re also romantic movement moments.”

If you identify with the demographics of Millennial, Gen Y or Gen Z, you might not be familiar with The Who and Mod culture.

But in post-war Britain the Mods were a cultural phenomenon characterised by fashion, music, and of course, scooters. The young rebels were seen as a counter-culture to the establishment and The Who, with Roger Daltry’s lead vocals and Pete Townshend’s writing, were the soundtrack.

Quadrophenia the album is widely regarded as an essay on the British adolescent experience at the time, focusing on the life of fictional protagonist Jimmy – a young Mod struggling with his sanity, self-doubt, and alienation. 

Townshend sets the rock opera in 1965 but thinks its themes of identity, mental health, and modern masculinity are just as relevant today.

He says: “The phobias and the restrictions and the unwritten laws about how young men should behave. The ground that they broke, that we broke because I was a part of it.

“Men were letting go of [the] wartime-related, uniform-related stance that if I wear this kind of outfit it makes me look like a man.”

This struggle of modern masculinity and identity appears to be echoing today as manosphere influencers like Andrew Tate, incel culture, and Netflix’s Adolescence make headlines.

For dancer Paris Fitzpatrick, who takes on the lead role of Jimmy, the story resonates.

“I think there’s a connection massively and I think there may even be a little more revival in some way,” he tells Sky News.

“I love that myself. I love non-conforming to gender norms and typical masculinity; I think it’s great to challenge things.”

Despite the album being written before he was born, the dancer says he was familiar with the genre already.

“I actually did an art GCSE project about Mods and rockers and Quadrophenia,” he says.

“I think we’ll be able to bring it to new audiences and hopefully, maybe people will be inspired to to learn more about their music and the whole cultural movement of the early 60s.”

In 1979, the album was adapted into a film directed by Franc Roddam starring Ray Winstone and Sting but Townshend admits because the film missed key points he is “not a big fan”.

“What it turned out to be in the movie was a story about culture, about social scenario and less about really the specifics of mental illness and how that affects young people,” he adds, also complimenting Roddam’s writing for the film.

Perhaps a testament to Pete Townshend’s creativity, Quadrophenia started as an album, was successfully adapted to film and now it will hit the stage as a contemporary ballet.

It appears that over six decades later Mod culture is still cool and their issues still relatable.

Quadrophenia, a Mod Ballet will tour to Plymouth Theatre Royal from 28 May to 1 June 2025, Edinburgh Festival Theatre from 10 to 14 June 2025 and the Mayflower, Southampton from 18 to 21 June 2025 before having its official opening at Sadler’s Wells Theatre, London on 24 June running to 13 July 2025 and then visiting The Lowry, Salford from 15 to 19 July 2025.

Entertainment

Russell Brand charged with rape and sexual assault

Published

2 days ago

April 4, 2025

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Russell Brand has been charged with rape and two counts of sexual assault between 1999 and 2005.

The Metropolitan Police say the 50-year-old comedian, actor and author has also been charged with one count of oral rape and one count of indecent assault.

The charges relate to four women.

He is due to appear at Westminster Magistrates’ Court on Friday 2 May.

Police have said Brand is accused of raping a woman in the Bournemouth area in 1999 and indecently assaulting a woman in the Westminster area of London in 2001.

He is also accused of orally raping and sexually assaulting a woman in Westminster in 2004.

The fourth charge alleges that a woman was sexually assaulted in Westminster between 2004 and 2005.

Police began investigating Brand, from Oxfordshire, in September 2023 after receiving a number of allegations.

The comedian has denied the accusations and said he has “never engaged in non-consensual activity”.

He added in a video on X: “Of course, I am now going to have the opportunity to defend these charges in court, and I’m incredibly grateful for that.”

Metropolitan Police Detective Superintendent Andy Furphy, who is leading the investigation, said: “The women who have made reports continue to receive support from specially trained officers.

“The Met’s investigation remains open and detectives ask anyone who has been affected by this case, or anyone who has any information, to come forward and speak with police.”