This is politics but not as we know it.

Up and down the country public meetings are being held where attendees speak candidly, listen respectfully and pay tribute to those with whom they passionately disagree.

The MPs are often, genuinely, undecided on the subject and are more inclined to listen than to impose their views.

When it comes to assisted dying the debate feels different – underpinned by a free vote and informed by deeply personal experiences, much of it playing out in town halls and community centres.

It’s about as far away from the superficial divisions of Westminster politics as it can get.

At a gathering this week in Sandhurst, Berkshire, a young woman described her mother, who is in her 60s – a once fun, kind and energetic woman who after years fighting cancer is now fading before her eyes.

She told the silent room she feels powerless to help and broke down in tears as she appealed to Labour MP Peter Swallow to back a change in the law.

As she struggled to tell her story a man sitting in the row in front got up and put his arm around her.

He later told the meeting he was against the legislation, concerned it could make older people feel obligated to die.

He believed his own father had felt like a burden in his final years. The woman who he had supported reached out and took his hand as he spoke.

Others talked about their faith with quiet but compelling conviction, and many raised concerns about pressure on patients and doctors.

Read more:
Canada’s assisted dying programme has gone too far, says lawyer who tried to take own life
Why is assisted dying so controversial?

‘I’m looking to my own conscience’

Mr Swallow, the newly elected MP for Bracknell who held the meeting, described the process of coming to a conclusion on a matter of conscience.

“This is one of the parts of my decision-making,” he said.

“I’ve also been speaking to medical experts, looking over contributions from people who work in the palliative care sector, and I have been reading the select committee report from the last parliament on this issue.

“I’ve read line by line through the Bill as well… and of course, I’m looking to my own conscience, looking to my own experience with death and weighing up all of those issues.

“I’ll be listening to the debate in Parliament as well and using that to really finally decide how I’m going to cast my vote.”

He is one of hundreds of MPs who have spent the past few weeks weighing all the arguments and may even wait until the day to decide, making the result of the second reading vote on Friday as unpredictable as it is consequential.

Decision ‘about shortening some quite horrible deaths’

The feeling among its supporters is that the shift in public opinion in favour of assisted dying will be reflected in parliament, and in particular among the vast new cohort of mostly Labour MPs.

A leading voice among them is Dr Jeevun Sandher, who has been making the case to colleagues and offering public backing to the Bill’s sponsor, Kim Leadbeater.

He said: “We should be clear that 70 people die every single day… for whom palliative care cannot allay their pain. They have built a tolerance to opioids. They’re allergic to them. You can’t just pump them full of morphine.

“So for those towards the end of their life, for me, the choice is quite clear.

“What we should be doing is hope to alleviate suffering in accordance with their wishes in a safe, responsible manner, which Kim’s bill does.

“For some people, they will choose to end their life and others will not. And that’s completely fine. But we are talking the last six months. This is about shortening some quite horrible deaths.”

‘I don’t want our society to go down this route’

There is, however, steadfast and long-standing opposition, made up of MPs like Conservative Harriett Baldwin whose own father was handed a death sentence by doctors, only to recover.

“I think it’s very difficult to say definitively that someone is going to die within the next six months,” she said.

“From a personal point of view, I had an experience with my own father who was basically decreed to be almost dead and lived for another 20 years…

“He made it through. He lived to see his grandchildren grow up. And we’re so blessed that we had him for those extra 20 years.

“So, medically, ethically, legally, there are so many issues that I am not comfortable with and I don’t want our society to go down this route. And that’s why I shall vote against on the 29th.”

For the many who are still undecided though, the next few days are critical.

High-level interventions from Cabinet figures and angry headlines about splits at the top may sway opinion at the margins but what sets votes like this apart is that they are not won or lost in the corridors of power.

For once, it’s quiet voices, gentle politics and personal reflections that will dictate what Westminster does.

Anyone feeling emotionally distressed or suicidal can call Samaritans for help on 116 123 or email jo@samaritans.org in the UK. In the US, call the Samaritans branch in your area or 1 (800) 273-TALK