Prenuptial agreements are on the rise – so why do they still feel taboo?

Published

2 years ago

May 18, 2024

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As Olivia* was picking her wedding dress, she and her partner Leo were also discussing divorce.

Despite being in love and ready to commit, having a prenup, they both agreed, was simply the sensible thing to do when starting married life.

“You go into it with love and hope for the future,” Olivia says. “But also realism.”

They are not alone. Once the preserve of Hollywood celebs and the super-rich, prenuptial agreements are on the rise among “normal” people too, with legal and marriage experts saying numbers have increased dramatically in recent years; around one in five weddings in the UK now involves some form of legal agreement, according to several polls.

Olivia and Leo got engaged last year after meeting on a dating app. Olivia, in her early 40s, is a business founder and Leo, who is in his late 30s, now works for her company. He was the one to initially broach the subject of a prenup.

“I didn’t want to at first as it doesn’t feel very romantic,” says Olivia. “It kind of puts a dampener on things – you’re at this really happy stage of getting married and then you’re potentially talking about, what happens if we split?”

Both have children from previous marriages, both have been through divorce. They decided a prenup was the right thing to do. Now, just a few weeks after their honeymoon, they are happily reminiscing through their wedding day photos; the prenup filed away, no longer a talking point, but there should they ever need it.

“It didn’t feel right that if something was to happen in the future, I could just have what she had built with her business,” says Leo. “I wanted to make the decision from my heart and do what’s right and to focus on building shared assets together.”

“Both of us had amicable divorces,” Olivia adds. “But we know what can happen. It’s reality, and I think life is more complex these days.”

The law on prenups in the UK

A prenuptial or premarital agreement is one made before a couple marries or enters into a civil partnership, setting out how they wish assets to be divided in the event of a split. They are not automatically enforceable in England and Wales, but following a landmark ruling by the Supreme Court in 2010, courts now take them into account as long as they have been made in good faith.

They have long been commonplace for celebrities: Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie reportedly had one, as apparently did Britney Spears and Sam Asghari. Catherine Zeta Jones reportedly told Vanity Fair back in 2000, the year she married Michael Douglas, that she thinks prenups are “brilliant”. And over the past few years, they have filtered into the real world, too.

Co-op Legal Services says prenup sales in 2023 were up by 60% on 2022, as were cohabitation agreements – and that postnup agreements almost trebled (an increase of almost 185%) in the same period. It says 21% of married people in Britain, or one in five couples, now have some form of an agreement in place, tallying with research published by marriage advocate charity the Marriage Foundation in 2021.

The average value of the assets included in Co-op prenups sits between £500,000 and £600,000, it says. Family law firm OLS Solicitors also reports a big increase in requests – a rise of 60% between 2021 and 2023, with a further 26% increase in the first quarter of 2024 compared with the same period last year.

Experts put the rise down to a number of factors: women earning more; more people remarrying and going into partnerships with children; the internet increasing savviness and accessibility when it comes to the law. Millennials and younger generations are also generally getting married later in life than their parents, therefore accruing more assets individually ahead of the milestone.

Plus, these generations have grown up experiencing divorce between mums and dads or other people close to them, in a way that was far less common for their parents and grandparents.

‘Break-up talk isn’t romantic – neither is death, but we make a will’

Despite the rising number of couples choosing this route, it seems few are comfortable talking about it publicly. The idea of a prenup being “unromantic” still prevails.

Olivia and Leo did not want to give their real names, saying they did not feel ready to share the details with the world. They arranged their prenup through Wenup, an online platform aiming to make couples’ deals more accessible and affordable, launched in the UK in 2023 in response to the increasing demand.

“Prenups are considered taboo, unromantic and are something very private to most people,” says Wenup co-founder James Brookner.

“This is changing for younger generations who have a more open, pragmatic and non-traditional view of marriage, but for many people, thinking about what will happen if they break up in the lead-up to a wedding is a difficult enough conversation to have in private, let alone public.”

Nicole*, who moved from the UK to New Zealand several years ago and married her husband, Will, after three years together in 2019, says they discussed getting a prenup – or contracting out agreement, as they are known there – before she moved in with him, six months into their relationship.

“[He] raised the idea because he had worked hard to buy his first house and wanted to ensure he retained his rights to ownership should our relationship break down,” Nicole says.

The 38-year-old admits she was “caught a bit off guard” when he first broached the subject, but due to the law in the country – the Property Relationships Act, which means any individually owned property is shared equally in the event of a break-up after three years of a couple living together, regardless of marriage – it felt like the right thing to do.

They reached an agreement they were both happy with and Will, 42, covered legal costs as they had to have independent advice. The couple now have a young daughter and are happily married – and for this, you have to balance romance and practicality, says Nicole.

“Talking about breaking up isn’t romantic – nor is talking about death, but we all have to write a will at some stage. I think the reluctance is often because one party is trying to protect assets from the other, with no ill intent usually, but I can see why the other party may feel a little despondent about the suggestion if they don’t understand the law.

“Personally, I have seen too many nasty break-ups that could have been a lot cleaner had the proper agreements been in place at the outset.”

What do prenups cover?

While couples in the UK might not be showing them off along with their engagement pics, attitudes are changing privately. A YouGov poll in 2023 found that 42% of British people consider prenups a good idea, compared with 13% who consider them a bad idea. A similar poll on prenups 10 years earlier found that 35% would sign a prenup if asked to, with 36% saying they would not.

Family law solicitor Tracey Moloney, who is known as The Legal Queen online – with more than a million followers across her TikTok, Instagram, Facebook and YouTube accounts – says social media has made legal advice more accessible.

Up to about five years ago she would probably get one prenuptial request a year, if that. Now, she averages about one a week, taking cohabitation agreements for unmarried couples into consideration as well. She says she would always advise couples to have one.

“I think any family lawyer is going to say that because we see so many divorces. We’re realists. I think people can forget that when you say ‘I do’, you are entering into a contractual relationship anyway… financial ties exist because your marriage has created a binding contract. If you’re going to go into a contract in any other scenario – buying a property, buying shares in a company – you’re going to take advice. I don’t think marriage should be seen any differently.”

Prenups can cover anything from money to property to assets – including future assets such as expected inheritance – whether they are worth millions or simply of sentimental value, she points out, citing a recent agreement drawn up to protect an antique writing desk. It was “really dear to that person, passed down from generation to generation”, but of no real monetary value.

At the other end of the scale, she recalls one divorce after a long marriage which didn’t involve a prenup; the wife had inherited jewellery worth hundreds of thousands of pounds. “It was never intended to be sold but it had significant value and it was added to her side of the balance sheet. She kept the jewellery but as a result, the ex kept a lot more of his pension, which she was entitled to. If she’d had a prenup, it could have been ring-fenced.”

Michelle Elman, a TV life coach and author known as Queen Of Boundaries, says when it comes to prenups she encourages any conversations about finance early on in a relationship.

“It’s hard to say, black or white, whether prenups are good or bad as it depends on the couple,” she says. “Some people might think a prenup is going into a marriage with bad faith, but if you’re going into the marriage with more certainty and clarity because you have it, then that’s best for you.

“The unhealthy option is not going into a prenup because you’re scared to have the conversation. I think for any healthy marriage to survive, you need to have already spoken about money before you get married, whether it’s because of a prenup or not.”

From proposal to prenup

Harry Benson, research director for the Marriage Foundation, says he was surprised at the results of the charity’s survey findings. “I thought this was something we would only find among the very richest people,” he says.

The 20% having some form of agreement applied to those married since 2000, compared with just 1.5% who were married in the 1970s, 5% in the 1980s and 8% in the 1990s. The charity’s poll did find higher earners were more likely to have prenups; higher earning women in particular. In terms of education, the findings were the other way round.

Mr Benson says he personally finds the idea of “dividing up the spoils before you even get started” as “deeply” unromantic. “Divorce law, broadly speaking, protects people,” he says. “For the vast majority, there’s not an awful lot of point to getting them. And of course, there is the risk that you make the proposal, down on one knee, and then say, ‘please sign my prenup’. The response? ‘Get stuffed! Are you the type of person I want to marry?'”

However, he says the research found no link to divorce rates – that having a prenup did not make it more or less likely that a couple would go on to break up.

“It’s not for me, but it is for some people,” he says. “I can see why people do it and I can certainly see the benefits for some… I just personally find them a bit oxymoronic.”

But the idea of the prenup being unromantic is definitely changing. Wenup says making the process more equitable and open means they are seeing the shift firsthand, with customers who don’t necessarily fit the stereotype of rich wealth protectors.

“If you’re not sure you need one, you probably need one,” says the Legal Queen. “They’re a bit like insurance – you hope you never have to claim on it, but it’s there to protect you if you do.”

*Names have been changed

UK

Teachers to be trained to tackle misogyny and ‘toxic ideas’ among boys

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6 hours ago

December 18, 2025

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Teachers to be trained to tackle misogyny and 'toxic ideas' among boys

Teachers will be trained to spot early signs of misogyny in boys and steer them away from it as part of the government’s long-awaited strategy to tackle violence against women and girls (VAWG).

Sir Keir Starmer warned “too often toxic ideas are taking hold early and going unchallenged”, with more than 40% of young men said to hold a positive view of misogynistic influencer Andrew Tate.

He has been challenged about his ideology in the past and called the concerns “garbage”.

Sir Keir’s government will formally unveil a £20m package of measures today, with £16m coming from the taxpayer and £4m from philanthropists and partners.

Teachers will also get specialist training on how to talk to pupils about issues like consent and the dangers of sharing intimate images – and all secondary school pupils in England will be taught about healthy relationships.

Such lessons will be mandatory by the end of this parliament in 2029, with schools to be chosen for a pilot scheme in 2026, which experts will be brought in to deliver.

And an online helpline will be set up for teenagers with concerns about their own behaviour in relationships.

The measures are part of the government’s strategy to halve VAWG in a decade, and the prime minister said it’s a “responsibility we owe to the next generation”.

“Every parent should be able to trust that their daughter is safe at school, online and in her relationships,” he said.

“This government is stepping in sooner – backing teachers, calling out misogyny, and intervening when warning signs appear – to stop harm before it starts.”

Department for Education-commissioned research found 70% of secondary school teachers surveyed said their school had actively dealt with sexual violence and/or harassment between children.

VAWG minister Jess Phillips told Sky News political editor Beth Rigby she had spoken to her own children about what’s normal sexual behaviour and what isn’t because she knows “what they might be exposed to”.

She said if the government does nothing to intervene, VAWG could double rather than be halved.

Jess Phillips: I’ve talked to my kids about strangulation

The government has already announced several other measures to tackle VAWG this week, including introducing specialist rape and sexual offences investigators to every police force, better support for survivors in the NHS, and a £19m funding boost for councils to provide safe housing for domestic abuse survivors.

Investment ‘falls short’

But Dame Nicole Jacobs, the domestic abuse commissioner for England and Wales, said the commitments “do not go far enough” and schools are overburdened already.

“Today’s strategy rightly recognises the scale of this challenge and the need to address the misogynistic attitudes that underpin it, but the level of investment to achieve this falls seriously short,” she said.

Claire Waxman, the incoming victims commissioner, added: “Victim services are not an optional extra to this strategy – they must be the backbone of it.

“Without clear, sustainable investment and cross-government leadership, I am concerned we run the risk of the strategy amounting to less than the sum of its parts; a wish list of tactical measures rather than a bold, unifying strategic framework.”

UK

Jess Phillips on tackling violence against women and girls: ‘I’ve tried to talk to my children about strangulation – it’s not normal sexual behaviour’

Published

6 hours ago

December 18, 2025

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Jess Phillips on tackling violence against women and girls: 'I've tried to talk to my children about strangulation - it's not normal sexual behaviour'

There have been three strategies by three successive governments to tackle violence against women and girls (VAWG) since 2010, and one refresh.

What has been the result of these endeavours? Police chiefs in 2024 described the scale of violence against women and girls as “a national emergency” as over one million incidents were reported in 2022/3, accounting for 20% of all police recorded crime.

At least one in every 12 women will be a victim, but the number is probably higher than that, as this sort of violence is typically underreported.

You will likely know a woman who is the victim of abuse. When you look at the situation, and think of all the mums, sisters, daughters, aunts and friends, it makes you want to put your head in your hands: strategy after strategy, plan after plan, women and girls and the victims of abuse are being let down.

Today, the government will launch a new strategy, drawn up by Jess Phillips, the safeguarding minister, that will attempt to finally put this right.

The promise is to halve violence against women and girls in a decade after what has been, as Phillips puts it, “a catalogue of failures”.

That catalogue of failures is long.

Successive governments had “failed to deliver a genuinely whole-of-government approach”, concluded the National Audit Office (NAO) at the beginning of this year, as it detailed a string of shortcomings when it came to VAWG plans: partial implementation; failure to learn from past strategies; no oversight of government funding being used for VAWG; a focus on victim support rather than prevention; and a lack of buy-in from government departments.

Phillips, who spent her career campaigning for victims of domestic violence before becoming an MP, wants to break that chain with her new plan, which has three pillars: prevention, with a focus on boys and young men to challenge misogyny and promote healthy relationships; stopping abusers, with more efforts and power for police forces to track down abusers; and more victim support.

It is a strategy that has been delayed three times. It was first expected in the spring, then the summer, to autumn, before eventually landing 18 months into a Labour government.

The delays have drawn criticism from campaigners, frustrated they “put more lives at risk”.

‘I’m going to be getting up in everybody’s business’

When I spoke to Phillips about those delays on the Electoral Dysfunction podcast, she made no apology for that: “I could have hit the deadline and missed the point.”

“I’m not really interested in a headline that says, ‘minister delivers a strategy one time’,” she said, explaining she’d had to “bang heads together” in different government departments to get buy-in and coordination (something the NAO said previous strategies lacked).

Phillips said the strategy contains a written action plan with time frames in it, as she insists the target to halve VAWG can be hit within the decade, despite the delay. There will be an inter-ministerial VAWG group to improve cross-government working.

She said: “What we have been doing is going into other government departments and building up relationships with their teams. We have VAWG-specific staff in Number 10 now. That’s never existed before. And we have been in the Department of Health. We have been in the Department of Transport. The real answer is I’m going to be getting up in everybody’s business. That’s the reason it has taken so long.”

Strategy also focuses on men and boys

Speaking to Phillips, you cannot doubt her determination to make it a reality, and much of this strategy focuses on men and boys as well as women and girls, with a big focus on prevention and stopping abuse.

“I would be failing, we would be failing, if we didn’t try to prevent people who were already perpetrating – and stopping people becoming perpetrators in the first place,” she said.

That involves the classroom and more conversations and bringing in men and boys to make them feel they are part of this.

Risk of ‘doubling’ VAWG

When I point out to Phillips that one in four 18 to 29-year-olds had favourable views towards Andrew Tate, she was quick to make the point that three out of four don’t.

“If we don’t do something about the situation with what young people, both victims and perpetrators, are exposed to, then not only would we not halve [VAWG in a decade], but I would also be talking about the risk of doubling it,” she said.

‘I have spoken to my children in really explicit terms’

What struck me in our conversation, and as a mum of two teenagers myself, is the role Phillips said we all need to take in talking to our children about what they are being exposed to online.

Phillips points out that the age profile of perpetrators is dropping as younger people become more exposed to violent pornography.

One of the elements in the strategy is to ban strangulation in porn. Another is to have mandatory guidance in secondary schools to offer lessons on culture, increasing awareness of artificial intelligence and how pornography links to misogyny.

Phillips, who has two sons, said it’s incumbent on all of us to have those conversations with our kids about what is normal sexual behaviour and what is not.

“I have spoken to my children in really explicit terms about the things that I think they might be seeing and think as standardised in sexual practice,” she told me. “I have tried to talk to them about things like strangulation. I have said it is totally and utterly not like normal sexual behaviour because I know what they might be exposed to.”

Criticism over handling of grooming gangs

But as a campaigner around domestic violence and now a minister charged with halving VAWG, Phillips has also faced criticism over the government’s handling of grooming gangs.

Fiona Goddard, who was abused by an organised street gang in Bradford, quit her role on the victims panel in the autumn and called for the resignation of the minister over her handling of the inquiry setup, which Phillips admitted she found personally difficult.

She said: “I’m not going to lie and pretend that it’s nice when the thing that you care the most about in the world is the thing you are criticised for. And actually, when Fiona Goddard does that, I just take it. Fiona Goddard has every right to criticise me. When other people who never have done a bar’s work in this area, but want to use that to politically criticise, I think that’s cynical.

“One of the things that I think has been hardest about this process is that I am held to a different standard to literally everybody else. Now of course I should be held to a different standard because let’s be honest, Beth, I’m better than most people who’ve had my job before because of my experience.”

‘The strategy isn’t the end, it’s the beginning’

Phillips, the victim herself of a torrent of online abuse from Elon Musk over grooming gangs earlier this year, before the latest furore over the setting up of the national inquiry, now has police protection.

I wonder whether the launch of the strategy might be the moment Phillips steps back, but she’s having none of it.

“The strategy isn’t the end, it’s the beginning. There’s a lot of work to do. I would be lying if I didn’t say it didn’t have a mental toll on me, but I am not the only person doing this work, it isn’t all on me… the upside is better, it’s worth it,” she said.

The strategy Phillips is spearheading is the fourth in 15 years. After a series of false starts, Phillips insisted this time it will be different. For the sake of our women and our girls, I hope she is right.

UK

Labour MPs urge Home Office to ensure settled status changes do not pull support for Hong Kongers

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6 hours ago

December 18, 2025

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Labour MPs urge Home Office to ensure settled status changes do not pull support for Hong Kongers

Dozens of Labour MPs have called on the government to ensure changes to permanent residency requirements do not pull support for Hong Kongers and others on humanitarian visas.

The 34 MPs say they have “significant concerns about the potential adverse consequences” of changes announced in November to indefinite leave to remain (IRL), which allows migrants to live, work and study permanently in the UK, then acquire British citizenship.

They have written to migration minister Mike Tapp to ask him to ensure new requirements are not applied retroactively to about 200,000 Hong Kongers who were granted British National Overseas (BNO) visas from 2021 by the previous Conservative government after fleeing a crackdown by Beijing.

Of particular concern is the newly announced requirement for “upper intermediate” (B2) level of English, increased from “intermediate” (B1), and the necessity to have earned more than £12,570 a year for a minimum of three to five years before being able to apply for IRL.

The earliest Hong Kongers who came to the UK on a BNO visa will become eligible to apply for IRL from March 2026, with the MPs fearing they could be prevented from earning settled status after already waiting five years.

They said they are faced with the “prospect of an alarming scenario where a great number of BNO visa holders are locked out of attaining ILR after five years in the UK, as was promised to them when they repatriated to the UK”.

“Returning to Hong Kong is not an option for them,” the MPs warned.

They said pensioners, disabled people, young adults, those at university and homemakers will all fail to meet the minimum salary requirements, which would mean they could be denied IRL.

The MPs said the Home Office should recognise other contributions, such as volunteering, caring responsibilities or being a key worker, and should continue to recognise a degree taught in English at a UK university as meeting the proficiency in English.

‘Historic duty’

Senior Labour MP Sarah Champion, a signatory, told Sky News: “I have BNO constituents who are now hugely anxious about their immigration status.

“The confusion over who is/isn’t eligible to remain with the government’s new immigration policy is severely impacting their mental health.

“The UK has a historic duty to Hong Kong, it was right the last government created the BNO scheme; we now need to make clear that people from Hong Kong are still welcome to remain.”

Research conducted by Labour MP James Naish, who has just under 3,000 BNO holders in his Rushcliffe constituency and organised the letter, found if the new English requirement was rolled out rigidly, only 8% of BNO visa households would be able to fully access ILR after five years in the UK.

His research, a survey of 6,667 BNO holders, found a further 43% of BNO households would have no members of their household eligible.

The MPs also said Hong Kong pensioners in the UK have left behind HK$3.8bn (about £360m) in Hong Kong’s state pension system, which they can only access once they have settled status, and with many having planned for five years this could cause them financial difficulties.

In their letter, the MPs also said all other humanitarian visa routes should be exempt from the changes, as otherwise it would “undermine the humanitarian intent” of the schemes.

Mr Naish told Sky News: “The BNO visa was created with cross-party support to offer a safe route for Hong Kongers following the crackdown on civil liberties in Hong Kong. Many families made life-changing decisions based on the clear promise of a path to settlement after five years.

“It’s essential that the small print of the government’s proposals on earned settlement reflects the government’s headline support for the BNO visa scheme.”

The Committee for Freedom in Hong Kong Foundation said: “The UK must honour its obligations under the Sino-British Joint Declaration and protect Hong Kongers seeking freedom here.”