College football Bottom 10 Week 8: Texas gets a little on the trashy side
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Ryan McGee, ESPN Senior Writer
Inspirational thought of the week:
So put me in the ground
Put me six foot down
And let the stone say
“Here lies the girl whose only crutch, Was loving one man just a little too much”
If you go before I do, I’m gonna tell the gravedigger that he better dig two
Dig two
— “Better Dig Two,” The Band Perry
Here at Bottom 10 Headquarters, located in the medical tent where the neck braces are stored to help Joey Galloway heal from whiplash after entire Saturdays of rapidly turning his head to go “WTH?” after every point made by Dan Mullen, we know that the college football seasons make the clubhouse turn into the back nine, the room where we live can become a rapidly emptying place.
At the start of each autumn, coaches love to remind us that every team in the land is beginning the season with a zero in the loss column. But never do they dare go through the Bottom 10 looking glass and allow themselves to be reminded that every team in the land also kicks off with a zero on the other side of that hyphen, or dash, or whatever it is, in the win column.
So, while those who claim to love the game continue to count and recount the dwindling number of FBS programs that remain undefeated, we here, who truly adore this sport on a deeper level, like to remind everyone of the other countdown of records. Those teams that are still seeking their first victory of the fall.
The room of undefeateds is still in double digits, a whopping 10. So what’s the point in applauding that? Here in the Bottom 10 Cinematic Universe, we are down to only two winless squads. The unbeaten room is so crowded we are going to call the fire marshal. Our room, the beaten room, college football’s most exclusive club, only needs a fire extinguisher.
With apologies to Deuce McAllister, David “The Deuce” Palmer, Duce Staley, Rob Base and Steve Harvey, here are the post-Week 8 Bottom 10 rankings:
The Golden(plated) Flashes lost their 16th straight game, to four-loss Boiling Green after losing a Pillow Fight of the Week to four-loss Baller State, and now they face three-loss Western Not Eastern Or Central Michigan, who sit atop the #MACtion standings. This is awesome if you’ve ever dreamed of seeing someone fall up a flight of stairs.
The New Owls on the Block (NO²TB) came off their bye week and resumed their chase of Kent as the nation’s only remaining oh-fer teams. Now Kennesaw Mountain will spend Wednesday night traveling to Liberty Mountain, where the undefeated Flames open every game with a prayer before leaving opponents without one.
The Eagles make a big jump/fall in these rankings, thanks in part to being one of the first FBS programs to fire its head coach (heeeey, East Carolina …) and also because they found a potential Fun Belt dancing partner for a potential season finale Pillow Fight of the Week of the Year of Century, or PFOWYOC, pronounced “puh-fow-yok,” which is also what Will Hall angrily called everyone in the front office as he was escorted out. And who is that PFOWYOC against?
The East Coast Trojans, who have charged into the top bottom four after three straight Fun Belt losses and now face the Fightin’ Butches of Arkansaw State, the same team that just ended Will Hall’s tenure in Hattiesburg.
A yellow flag was thrown on the field. Then Horns fans threw a bunch of stuff on the field. Then the flag was picked up off the field. Then the trash was picked up off the field. But … there was never another flag thrown because of the stuff thrown on the field?
The good news for the Blazers is that even though they keep losing, no one can see it because the entire state of Alabama is shrouded in thick white smoke from the dumpster fire on the Plains and the panic attacks in Tuscaloosa.
The Other Other Aggies continue their 2026 Pac-12 Admittance party by playing like a 2022 Pac-12 team, falling to 1-6 after losing to New Mexico’s non-Aggies. Now, while we are obsessing over current #MACtion PFOWYs and future Fun Belt PFOWYOCs, Utah State is hitting the road for a showdown that has snuck up on us, against …
The Chowboys knew the way to San Jose, but unfortunately, Spartans wideout Nick Nash knew the way to the end zone for the seventh straight game. If Wyoming is going to fulfill its dream of three-peating as Arizona Bowl champions, it can’t lose again this season.
New Duke head coach Manny Diaz has now successfully beaten the coach who embarrassed him at Texas, UNC’s Mack Brown, his alma mater FSU, and in two weeks has a chance to ruin the year for the school that fired him three years ago, Miami. The last time someone went through ACC country like this, they were carrying orders from Sherman.
The Buttermakers are 1-6 and 0-4 in conference play. After an open date, they host Northworstern, which is 3-4 and 1-3 in the conference. With all the changes in college football, especially in the Big Ten, this game is like being wrapped up in an old blanket from your grandma’s house. Sure, it needs to be washed and it smells like a gym sock dipped in kitty litter and VapoRub, but at least it’s familiar.
Waiting list: UMess, FI(notA)U, UTEPid (aka the team that just beat FIU), Temple of Doom, Living on Tulsa Time (aka the team that just lost to Temple of Doom), Whew Mexico State, Me-dle Tennessee, Fa-la-la-la-la La-la-la-Tech, Baller State, Miss Sus Hippie State, Snore Eagle, Akronmonious, flopping.
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Jesse Rogers
DENVER — The Chicago Cubs are signing first baseman Carlos Santana, a source told ESPN on Sunday.
Santana, 39, hit .225 with 11 home runs in 116 games for the Cleveland Guardians this season before being released by the team Friday.
The move is expected to become official Monday.
The 16-year veteran has a career .778 OPS while playing for seven teams, though most of his time was spent with the Guardians, whom he rejoined this year after spending a decade there to start his career.
Though he is a switch-hitter, Santana is likely to see at-bats as a right-hander almost exclusively as the Cubs are 17-19 this season when a left-hander starts against them. Left-handed hitter Michael Busch is the regular starter at first base, but he has been spelled by veteran Justin Turner often this season.
It’s unclear what Santana’s signing means for the immediate future of Turner, who is considered the clubhouse leader on the team. With rosters expanding to 28 on Monday, the Cubs have several options open to them to keep Turner if they desire.
In other moves Sunday, the Cubs claimed right-hander Aaron Civale off waivers from the Chicago White Sox, recalled right-hander Porter Hodge from Triple-A Iowa, optioned left-hander Jordan Wicks to their top farm club and designated left-hander Tom Cosgrove for assignment.
The Cubs also are calling up outfielder Kevin Alcantara and sending down Owen Caissie, a source told ESPN.
Civale, 30, is 3-9 with a 5.26 ERA in 18 starts for the White Sox and Milwaukee Brewers this season. The Brewers traded him to the White Sox in June to acquire first-baseman Andrew Vaughn.
Cubs manager Craig Counsell said Civale is expected to come out of the bullpen for the team.
“It’s just length options in case we need it,” Counsell said. “It’s just to be covered with another guy that can start.”
Hodge is 2-1 with a 6.85 ERA and two saves in 26 appearances for Chicago this year. In his past nine appearances with Iowa going back to Aug. 1, he struck out 20 and allowed six hits over 12 scoreless innings.
The 25-year-old Wicks, a first-round pick in the 2021 amateur draft, is 0-1 with an 8.71 ERA in six relief appearances with the Cubs this year.
Cosgrove has a 2.25 ERA in two appearances for the Cubs this season.
The Cubs will enter the final month of the season as the No. 1 seed in the National League wild-card race, trailing the first-place Milwaukee Brewers by 6.5 games in the NL Central entering Sunday.
The Associated Press contributed to this report.
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David Purdum
Cleveland Guardians pitchers Emmanuel Clase and Luis Ortiz will remain on nondisciplinary paid leave “until further notice” while a gambling investigation continues, Major League Baseball announced Sunday.
MLB said in a statement Sunday that the league and players’ association had agreed to extend the leaves of Clase and Ortiz, adding, “We will not comment further until the investigation has been completed.”
The investigation stems from unusual betting interest in individual pitches by Ortiz in two Guardians games in June. A sportsbook reported “suspicious betting” on the first pitch thrown by Ortiz to be a ball or hit batsman to begin the second inning of a June 15 game against the Seattle Mariners and again in the third inning of a June 27 game against the St. Louis Cardinals. In both instances, Ortiz threw a first-pitch slider that was well outside the strike zone.
Integrity firm IC360, which works with sportsbooks, sports leagues and state regulators to monitor the betting market, sent out an alert to clients regarding the unusual activity involving Ortiz’s pitches on June 27. Ortiz was placed on nondisciplinary paid leave July 3.
Clase, the Guardians’ closer, was put on nondisciplinary paid leave weeks later, on July 28.
The Ohio Casino Control Commission, which oversees the state’s sports betting market, has said it is investigating the situation alongside and independently of MLB.
Betting on the result of pitches is a niche market, offered by only a select few U.S. sportsbooks. New Jersey and Ohio have taken steps to prohibit state-licensed sportsbooks from offering such markets, commonly referred to as microbetting, but for now, some sportsbooks continue to offer betting on the result of individual pitches.
Clase, the American League leader in saves in 2024, had 24 saves and was 5-3 with a 3.23 ERA this season. Ortiz, meanwhile, was 4-9 with a 4.36 ERA in 16 starts.
Entering Sunday, the Guardians are three games back in the American League wild-card race.
BOSTON — Jarren Duran was running to third base when he realized he needed to pick up the pace again and head for home.
Duran’s inside-the-park homer Sunday, a three-run shot, gave Boston the lead in the fifth inning and helped the Red Sox avert a three-game sweep with a 5-2 victory over the Pittsburgh Pirates at Fenway Park.
With Carlos Narvaez on third and Alex Bregman on first, Duran lined the first pitch from starter Mitch Keller into the right-center gap.
The ball got past right fielder Alexander Canario, who tried to cut it off, and rolled into the Fenway triangle. Then it caromed off the side wall of Boston’s bullpen and briefly got past center fielder Oneil Cruz near the 420-foot sign in right-center.
As the crowd roared, the speedy Duran raced around third and easily beat a wide relay throw to the plate standing up.
“When I was starting to round second, I was like, OK, I’ve got to make sure I get to three,” Duran said. “I thought I was going to be standing up [at third]. I found myself kind of lay back a little bit, then [third base coach Kyle Hudson] came back to me waving and I was like, ‘I’ve got to get going again.'”
It was the second inside-the-park homer by the Red Sox at Fenway Park this season. Wilyer Abreu hit one on June 30 and became the sixth player in major league history with a grand slam and an inside-the-park homer in the same game.
“I was just happy I didn’t have to slide after all,” Duran said. “I was like, this is going to be more of a fall than a slide.”
Duran’s inside-the-park shot was the first of his career.
“Everybody’s doing the same thing in the dugout,” Boston manager Alex Cora said, comparing his players and coaches to the cheering crowd.
“We become fans. Everybody’s loud, everybody’s sending him.”
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