Maybe someday I’ll be more together Stretched by fewer thoughts that leave me Chasing after my dreams, disown me, loaded with danger So maybe I’ll win … Saved by zero Maybe I’ll win … Saved by zero
— “Saved by Zero,” The Fixx
Here at Bottom 10 Headquarters, located behind the Pixar character rental office where they loaned out that red Anger face from “Inside Out” that Nick Saban borrowed for the Alabama–Tennessee game, we are wondering what the heck happened to our numerical BFF. You know, our old pal zero? Cero? Nula? Zewo?
When the final buzzer blared over the last late-night games on Saturday night/Sunday morning and the cigar smoke from Knoxville had finally cleared, we realized that … wait … could it be true?! We’re not even into November yet and there are now no zero-win teams remaining? Nil. Nada. Zilch. It’s the truth, thanks to Colorado’s overtime win over Cal.
It’s weird, right? I mean, sure, we’re used to seeing plenty of 0’s on scoreboards when the clock reads 00:00. We’re accustomed to knowing that zero of our teams will receive bowl berths. We’re plenty familiar with the feeling of knowing the answer when someone asks, “Hey, how many votes did your teams receive in the preseason media polls?” or “How many Bottom 10 teams are playing in prime time on ABC this weekend?” Scratch. Goose egg. Diddly squat.
But then, just as we have given up hope when it comes to ever seeing another zero sum in front of the hyphen and all those losses, a hero rises. A new No. 1 Bottom 10 team. And though it may no longer have a “0-” at the front of its record, its very name steps in to fill the sudden volumeless void.
The Zips.
With apologies to George Plimpton, Damian Lillard and Steve Harvey, here’s the post-Week 7 Bottom 10 rankings.
1. Akronmonious (1-5)
And there was one, as in one remaining #MACtion team with one win. Just three weeks ago, most of the conference fit that description. And then the Zips played Not Eastern Or Western But Central Michigan in the Pillow Fight of the Week Episode VI: The MACtion Menace. And then they were tied with 2:01 to go, with the ball and driving. And then this happened.
The Minutemen got Buffaloed by the Bulls Not Bills 34-7 and now face the Fightin’ Byes of Open Date U., who have been installed as a six-touchdown favorite.
3. North by Northworstern (1-5)
Speaking of off weeks, the Mildcats spent theirs licking their post-Wisconsin wounds while Wisconsin spent its weekend making Northwestern’s 42-7 loss to the coachless Badgers even Northworstern as they lost to then-2-4 Bottom 10 Wait Listers Michigan State in double overtime. Now NU travels east for the kind of classic regional rivalry that is quickly becoming the trademark of the Big Ten, a visit to Maryland.
4. Nevada Oof Pack (2-5)
Wait, where did these guys come from? They weren’t even on the Waiting List two weeks ago, but now they jump/fall all the way to No. 4. How? A Week 6 loss to then-No. 1 Colorado State, followed by a Week 7 defeat at the hands of then-No. 2 Hawai’i. It’s the worst week for Nevadans since the government triggered a bunch of atomic bombs outside of Las Vegas and sold it as a tourist attraction. This time the mushroom cloud is coming from Reno.
5. Kansas Nayhawks (5-2)
As my dad told us when Santa brought us a huge new Death Star toy and we immediately blew it up with firecrackers, “You can’t have nice things!” The latest example: Kansas, which went 5-0, was ranked 19th in that other poll and hosted College GameDay … then went and lost two in a row. If we’re being honest, perhaps the Nayhawks are back here simply because we missed them. An itch we couldn’t scratch. A spot of rash that can only be smoothed by slathering of the ointment that is the Coveted Fifth Spot.
6. FI(not A)U (2-4)
The second-worst team named Panthers (behind the NFLers from Carolina) have run a Bottom 10 gauntlet — and by gauntlet we mean a rubber kitchen glove — with a win over Whew Mexico State but a 21-point loss to UCan’t. We don’t really know who they are, but will when they travel north to the home of those other Panthers for the Pillow Fight of the Week against …
7. Charlotte 1-and-6ers (1-6)
Remember way back to Week 4 when Charlotte beat Georgia State Not Southern? Since then, the 1-and-6ers haven’t won again, but Georgia State beat Georgia Southern, which beat Nebraska and just beat No. 25 James Madison, which beat Appalachian State, which beat then-No. 6 Texas A&M, which beat then-No. 10 Arkansas, which just beat BYU, which beat Stanford, which was on the Bottom 10 Waiting List last week but is there no longer because it just beat Notre Dame, which lost to Cal, which just lost to Colorado, which was the top/bottom-ranked Bottom 10 team. This is like that movie “Inception,” but if Leo DiCaprio had spent the entire movie slipping on banana peels.
8. US(notC)F (1-6)
The Bulls have mostly hovered around this list all season because if one watches them closely enough, they know that this team has been competitive in a lot of games against much more talented teams. But when you get into the second half of October and you are one of only seven FBS teams with one win, then you become like Glenn Close in “Fatal Attraction,” screaming from the pirate ship at Raymond James Stadium, “I won’t be IGNORED, DAN!” Dan being me, wondering where my rabbit went.
9. Colora-duh State (1-5)
The Rams made a statement in Week 6 when they defeated No-vada for their first win of the season. Then they made a follow-up statement by losing to Utah State, which had its third-string quarterback under center. The Rams game this weekend against Hawai’i was going to be a candidate for Pillow Fight of the Week of the Year of the Century, but then the Rainbow Warriors beat Nevada too. Why do you hate us, Nevada?
10. Whew Mexico (2-5)
Speaking of teams which keep tossing our worst-laid plans in the shredder, Whew Mexico State was looking at an epic Bottom 10 autumn with a Halloween visit to UMess and a pre-Turkey Day wobble to 2-4 Mizz-lose. But then it went and won the Battle of I-25 against Whew Mexico, now renamed the Battle of I-2-and-5.
Waiting List: Colora-duh, Whew Mexico State, ULM (pronounced “Uhlm”), Temple of Doom, Living on Tulsa Time, Huh-why-yuh, Arkan-saw State, Mizz-lose, Western not Eastern or Central Michigan, Lose-iana Tech, pretty much every team in Virginia, throwing the most awesome post-win souvenir into a river.
Ohio State opened as a 9.5-point favorite over Notre Dame in the College Football Playoff National Championship Presented by AT&T, per ESPN BET odds.
If that line holds, it would be tied for the second-largest spread in a CFP national championship game and the fourth largest in the CFP/BCS era. Georgia was -13.5 against TCU in the 2022 national championship, while Alabama showed -9.5 against none other than Ohio State to decide the 2020 campaign. Both favorites covered the spread in blowout fashion, combining for a cover margin of 63.
Notre Dame is 12-3 against the spread this season, tied with Arizona State (12-2) and Marshall (12-1) for the most covers in the nation. The Irish are 7-0 ATS against ranked teams and 2-0 ATS as underdogs, with both covers going down as outright victories, including their win over Penn State (-1.5) in the CFP national semifinal.
However, Notre Dame was also on the losing end of the largest outright upset of the college football season when it fell as a 28.5-point favorite to Northern Illinois.
Ohio State is 9-6 against the spread and has been a favorite in every game it has played this season; it has covered the favorite spread in every CFP game thus far, including in its semifinal win against Texas when it covered -6 with overwhelming public support.
The Buckeyes also have been an extremely popular pick in the futures market all season. At BetMGM as of Friday morning, OSU had garnered a leading 28.2% of money and 16.8% of bets to win the national title, checking in as the sportsbook’s greatest liability.
Ohio State opened at +700 to win it all this season and is now -350 with just one game to play.
ARLINGTON, Texas — Quinshon Judkins ran for two touchdowns before Jack Sawyer forced a fumble by his former roommate that he returned 83 yards for a clinching TD as Ohio State beat Texas28-14 in the Goodyear Cotton Bowl Classic on Friday night to advance to a shot for their sixth national title.
Led by Judkins and Sawyer, the Buckeyes (13-2) posted the semifinal victory in the same stadium where 10 years ago they were champions in the debut of the College Football Playoff as a four-team format. Now they have the opportunity to be the winner again in the debut of the expanded 12-team field.
Ohio State plays Orange Bowl champion Notre Dame in Atlanta on Jan. 20. It could be quite a finish for the Buckeyes after they lost to rival Michigan on Nov. 30. Ohio State opened as a 9.5-point favorite over the Irish, per ESPN BET.
“About a month ago, a lot of people counted us out. And these guys went to work, this team, these leaders, the captains, the staff,” Ohio State coach Ryan Day said. “Everybody in the building believed. And because of that, I believe we won the game in the fourth quarter.”
Sawyer got to Longhorns quarterback Quinn Ewers on a fourth-and-goal from the 8, knocking the ball loose and scooping it up before lumbering all the way to the other end. It was the longest fumble return in CFP history.
Ewers and Sawyer were roommates in Columbus, Ohio, for the one semester the quarterback was there before transferring home to Texas and helping lead the Longhorns (13-3) to consecutive CFP semifinals. But next season will be their 20th since winning their last national title with Vince Young in 2005.
Texas had gotten to the 1, helped by two pass-interference penalties in the end zone before Quintrevion Wisner was stopped for a 7-yard loss.
Judkins had a 1-yard touchdown for a 21-14 lead with 7:02 left. That score came four plays after quarterback Will Howard converted fourth-and-2 from the Texas 34 with a stumbling 18-yard run that was almost a score.
Howard was 24-of-33 passing for 289 yards with a touchdown and an interception.
Ewers finished 23-of-39 for 283 yards with two TD passes to Jaydon Blue and an interception after getting the ball back one final time.
Bill McCartney, a three-time coach of the year in the Big Eight Conference who led the Colorado Buffaloes to their only national football title in 1990, has died. He was 84.
McCartney died Friday night “after a courageous journey with dementia,” according to a family statement.
“Coach Mac touched countless lives with his unwavering faith, boundless compassion, and enduring legacy as a leader, mentor and advocate for family, community and faith,” the family said in its statement. “As a trailblazer and visionary, his impact was felt both on and off the field, and his spirit will forever remain in the hearts of those he inspired.”
After playing college ball under Dan Devine at Missouri, McCartney started coaching high school football and basketball in Detroit. He then was hired onto the staff at Michigan, the only assistant ever plucked from the high school ranks by Bo Schembechler.
Schembechler chose wisely. As the Wolverines’ defensive coordinator during the 1980 season, McCartney earned Big Ten “Player” of the Week honors for the defensive scheme he devised to stop star Purdue quarterback Mark Herrmann.
“When I was 7 years old, I knew I was going to be a coach,” McCartney told The Gazette in 2013. “My friends, other kids at that age were going to be president, businessmen, attorneys, firemen. Ever since I was a little kid, I imitated my coaches, critiqued them, always followed and studied them.”
In 1982, McCartney took over a Colorado program that was coming off three straight losing seasons with a combined record of 7-26. After three more struggling seasons, McCartney turned things around to go to bowl games in nine out of 10 seasons starting in 1985, when he switched over to a wishbone offense.
His 1989 team was 11-0 when it headed to the Orange Bowl, where Notre Dame dashed Colorado’s hopes of a perfect season. McCartney and the Buffaloes, however, would get their revenge the following season.
After getting off to an uninspiring 1-1-1 start in 1990, Colorado won its next nine games to earn a No. 1 ranking and a rematch with the Fighting Irish. This time the Buffaloes prevailed, 10-9, and grabbed a share of the national title atop the AP poll (Georgia Tech was tops in the coaches’ poll).
McCartney won numerous coach of the year honors in 1989, and he was also Big Eight Coach of the Year in 1985 and 1990. His teams went a combined 58-11-4 in his last six seasons before retiring (1989-94).
The Buffaloes finished in the AP Top 20 in each of those seasons, including No. 3 in McCartney’s final year, when the team went 11-1 behind a roster that included Kordell Stewart, Michael Westbrook and the late Rashaan Salaam. That season featured the “Miracle in Michigan,” with Westbrook hauling in a 64-yard TD catch from Stewart on a Hail Mary as time expired in a win at Michigan. Salaam also rushed for 2,055 yards to earn the Heisman Trophy.
McCartney also groomed the next wave of coaches, mentoring assistants such as Gary Barnett, Jim Caldwell, Ron Dickerson, Gerry DiNardo, Karl Dorrell, Jon Embree, Les Miles, Rick Neuheisel, Bob Simmons, Lou Tepper, Ron Vanderlinden and John Wristen.
“I was fortunate to be able to say goodbye to Coach in person last week,” Colorado athletic director Rick George, who worked under McCartney and was a longtime friend of his, said in a statement. “Coach Mac was an incredible man who taught me about the importance of faith, family and being a good husband, father and grandfather. He instilled discipline and accountability to all of us who worked and played under his leadership.
“The mark that he left on CU football and our athletic department will be hard to replicate.”
McCartney remains the winningest coach in Colorado history. He retired at age 54 with an overall record of 93-55-5 (.602) in 13 seasons, all with Colorado.
He was inducted into the College Football Hall of Fame in 2013. His family announced in 2016 that McCartney had been diagnosed with late-onset dementia and Alzheimer’s.
“Here’s what football does: It teaches a boy to be a man,” McCartney told USA Today in 2017. “You say, ‘How does it do that?’ Well, what if you line up across from a guy who’s bigger, stronger, faster and tougher than you are? What do you do? Do you stay and play? Or do you turn and run? That’s what football does. You’re always going to come up against somebody who’s better than you are.
“That’s what life is. Life is getting knocked down and getting back up and getting back in the game.”
In recent years, McCartney got to watch grandson Derek play defensive line at Colorado. Derek’s father, Shannon Clavelle, was a defensive lineman for Colorado from 1992-94 before playing a few seasons in the NFL. Derek’s brother, T.C. McCartney, was a quarterback at LSU and is the son of late Colorado quarterback Sal Aunese, who played for Bill McCartney in 1987 and ’88 before being diagnosed with stomach cancer in 1989 and dying six months later at 21.
Growing up, Derek McCartney used to go next door to his grandfather’s house to listen to his stories. He never tired of them.
When playing for Colorado, hardly a day would go by when someone wouldn’t ask Derek if he was somehow related to the coach.
“I like when that happens,” Derek said.
ESPN’s Adam Rittenberg and The Associated Press contributed to this report.