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Here’s to you, “Hammer the unders!” bettor! You listened to the experts, you tossed that knowledge into your group text threads like the boss you are, and this weekend you cried tears of joy. As for the money-line folks? The football gods again reminded us our sorrow is their delight. Buckets of tears were filled, and we’re here to break it down.



Dan Orlovsky now has the distinction of being the second prettiest quarterback to ever accidentally run out of the back of the end zone, but this 49ers-Broncos game takes the cake as the ugliest thing we’ve seen in ages. 11-10? Really? On Sunday night when we can’t even tune in to another game?! Money-line bettors — we’re SURE Jimmy Garoppolo would help the passing offense. Oops.

Only Orlovsky got to celebrate this one

Verdict: Three buckets



It’s ok to admit that Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers are incredible and their offenses are also incredibly bad, right? We knew this would be a defensive struggle, but you know Bucs money-line people were feeling all kinds of swaggy when Tampa had the chance to tie it with a 2-point conversion.

Oops. One wild delay of game penalty followed by a failed 2-point conversion and Packers money was celebrating like Remy from Ratatouille if he found a cheese board.

Verdict: Two buckets — one filled with sadness and one with joy.



Why does a blowout win by Jacksonville make this list? Because some of you lucky bettors were so confident in this game when you thought Herbert wouldn’t play, and you know darn well you threw your hands up in sadness and disgust when you found out he was in the lineup. Still, walk your walk and talk your talk because right now you look brilliant.

Verdict: 1.5 buckets — mostly filled with your pre-kickoff tears you’re now going to deny.



Bills offensive coordinator Ken Dorsey looked just like your Bills fan buddy at the bar as this game finished.

This has all the makings of a “why did I chase THAT game” game. First-half bad beat?

Winning team outgained by 275 stinking yards? Cool. Perfect. We even had a butt punt. A cheek kick? A tush push? OK, I’ll stop now.

Verdict: 3.5 buckets … and a clear indication of which side I bet on.

As always, we have to give Saturday credit for their contributions to chaos.



Missouri kicker Harrison Mevis had the chance to be the “Thicker Kicker Upper” with what could have been a game-winning chip-shot field goal to beat Auburn, but he wasn’t “Downy” to let this thing end in regulation.

I’m not proud of that joke. Actually, I am.

Anyway, Auburn got in on the missed kick fun, but an offsides call gave them a second shot in overtime. That turned into an Auburn lead, and I can only imagine the “Tastes great! Less filling!” back and forth that was happening at sports bars everywhere between Auburn and Missouri backers. Then … well … Missouri fans were reminded why they can’t have nice things.

Verdict: Five buckets



Raise your hand if you picked this upset. Now keep your hand in the air so we know who is buying dinner for the rest of the year.

Verdict: Four buckets of cash

Win or lose — from the first bucket of wings (with a side of bleu cheese, of course, as we can all agree ranch is trash) Saturday afternoon all the way to the last wing you ate Sunday night while you asked yourself how many hours are too many hours for chicken to sit out at room temperature — buckets were filled.

You can tweet me @jasonfitz with your bucket fillers and even get some awesome swag. Here’s to another week of chaos, my friends.

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Ichiro snubber still a mystery after ballot reveal

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Ichiro snubber still a mystery after ballot reveal

NEW YORK — The Hall of Fame voter who declined to select Ichiro Suzuki remains a mystery.

All 321 voters who allowed their ballots to be made public Tuesday by the Baseball Writers’ Association of America selected the Japanese star. Suzuki appeared on 393 of 394 ballots when voting was announced on Jan. 21.

“There’s one writer that I wasn’t able to get a vote from,” he said through an interpreter later that week. “I would like to invite him over to my house, and we’ll have a drink together, and we’ll have a good chat.”

The Hall’s rules allow each voter the choice whether to make a ballot public. The BBWAA voted 80-19 at its December 2016 meeting to propose making all ballots public, but the Hall of Fame’s board of directors decided to leave the decision up to each voter.

Mariano Rivera remains the only player to get 100% of the vote from the BBWAA, appearing on all 425 ballots in 2019. Derek Jeter was chosen on 395 of 396 in 2020.

Suzuki, CC Sabathia and Billy Wagner were elected by the BBWAA this year and will be inducted into the Hall at Cooperstown on July 27 along with Dave Parker and Dick Allen, voted in by the classic era committee in December.

Suzuki was a two-time AL batting champion and 10-time All-Star and Gold Glove outfielder, hitting .311 with 117 homers, 780 RBIs and 509 stolen bases with Seattle (2001-12, 2018-19), the New York Yankees (2012-14) and Miami (2015-17).

He is perhaps the best contact hitter ever, with 1,278 hits in Nippon Professional Baseball and 3,089 in MLB, including a season-record 262 in 2004. His combined total of 4,367 exceeds Pete Rose’s MLB record of 4,256.

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New NASCAR rule to reward fastest lap in race

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New NASCAR rule to reward fastest lap in race

DAYTONA BEACH, Fla. — NASCAR introduced a new rule Tuesday that will award one point to the team and driver with the fastest single lap in each race.

The “Xfinity Fastest Lap” was added as part of a contract renewal between NASCAR and Xfinity. The new deal awards a point for the fastest lap in all three of NASCAR’s national series, continues Xfinity’s role as entitlement sponsor of the second-tier series through 2025 and includes a multiyear agreement for Xfinity to extend its premium partnership with the Cup Series.

IndyCar has a fast-lap rule, but it was abolished in Formula 1 ahead of this season.

“We’re not just entering Year 11 of our partnership. We’re embarking on Year 1 of a renewed relationship with NASCAR filled with fresh energy and exciting opportunities to enhance the competition on the track in a way that has never been done before,” said Matt Lederer, Comcast’s vice president of brand partnership and engagement.

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‘Proud’ NHLPA, PHPA choose to join AFL-CIO

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'Proud' NHLPA, PHPA choose to join AFL-CIO

WASHINGTON — The National Hockey League Players’ Association and Professional Hockey Players’ Association are affiliating with the AFL-CIO and joining the labor organization’s sports council, they announced Monday.

Their membership brings the number of unions involved in the AFL-CIO, the biggest labor federation in the U.S., to 63, representing more than 15 million workers. It comes as collective bargaining talks are ongoing at multiple levels of the sport.

“Whether our work is on the rink, in the classroom or on the factory floor, every worker deserves a voice on the job and the power that comes with union membership,” AFL-CIO president Liz Shuler said. “We are thrilled to welcome the NHLPA and the PHPA into the federation and our Sports Council, and we look forward to supporting their work to ensure strong union contracts, fair wages, safe working conditions and professional development opportunities for professional hockey players.”

The NHLPA represents roughly 750 players across 32 teams, while the PHPA has 1,800 members in the American Hockey League and ECHL.

“The NHLPA’s membership is proud to join the AFL-CIO and its sports council during this important moment in the labor movement,” NHLPA executive director Marty Walsh said. “We look forward to working together with other players’ associations and unions from across North America to ensure that workers in all industries have a collective voice in fighting for fair wages and safe and equitable workplaces.”

The AFL-CIO formed a sports council in 2022 and already included unions representing players in the NFL, WNBA, Major League Soccer and National Women’s Soccer League.

“Our members are excited about taking an active role in working towards better outcomes for working people in every sector of the economy,” PHPA executive director Brian Ramsay said. “As we begin collective bargaining negotiations, our members will now enjoy the full support of the AFL-CIO at the bargaining table. This is what solidarity is all about.”

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