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Here’s to you, “Hammer the unders!” bettor! You listened to the experts, you tossed that knowledge into your group text threads like the boss you are, and this weekend you cried tears of joy. As for the money-line folks? The football gods again reminded us our sorrow is their delight. Buckets of tears were filled, and we’re here to break it down.



Dan Orlovsky now has the distinction of being the second prettiest quarterback to ever accidentally run out of the back of the end zone, but this 49ers-Broncos game takes the cake as the ugliest thing we’ve seen in ages. 11-10? Really? On Sunday night when we can’t even tune in to another game?! Money-line bettors — we’re SURE Jimmy Garoppolo would help the passing offense. Oops.

Only Orlovsky got to celebrate this one

Verdict: Three buckets



It’s ok to admit that Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers are incredible and their offenses are also incredibly bad, right? We knew this would be a defensive struggle, but you know Bucs money-line people were feeling all kinds of swaggy when Tampa had the chance to tie it with a 2-point conversion.

Oops. One wild delay of game penalty followed by a failed 2-point conversion and Packers money was celebrating like Remy from Ratatouille if he found a cheese board.

Verdict: Two buckets — one filled with sadness and one with joy.



Why does a blowout win by Jacksonville make this list? Because some of you lucky bettors were so confident in this game when you thought Herbert wouldn’t play, and you know darn well you threw your hands up in sadness and disgust when you found out he was in the lineup. Still, walk your walk and talk your talk because right now you look brilliant.

Verdict: 1.5 buckets — mostly filled with your pre-kickoff tears you’re now going to deny.



Bills offensive coordinator Ken Dorsey looked just like your Bills fan buddy at the bar as this game finished.

This has all the makings of a “why did I chase THAT game” game. First-half bad beat?

Winning team outgained by 275 stinking yards? Cool. Perfect. We even had a butt punt. A cheek kick? A tush push? OK, I’ll stop now.

Verdict: 3.5 buckets … and a clear indication of which side I bet on.

As always, we have to give Saturday credit for their contributions to chaos.



Missouri kicker Harrison Mevis had the chance to be the “Thicker Kicker Upper” with what could have been a game-winning chip-shot field goal to beat Auburn, but he wasn’t “Downy” to let this thing end in regulation.

I’m not proud of that joke. Actually, I am.

Anyway, Auburn got in on the missed kick fun, but an offsides call gave them a second shot in overtime. That turned into an Auburn lead, and I can only imagine the “Tastes great! Less filling!” back and forth that was happening at sports bars everywhere between Auburn and Missouri backers. Then … well … Missouri fans were reminded why they can’t have nice things.

Verdict: Five buckets



Raise your hand if you picked this upset. Now keep your hand in the air so we know who is buying dinner for the rest of the year.

Verdict: Four buckets of cash

Win or lose — from the first bucket of wings (with a side of bleu cheese, of course, as we can all agree ranch is trash) Saturday afternoon all the way to the last wing you ate Sunday night while you asked yourself how many hours are too many hours for chicken to sit out at room temperature — buckets were filled.

You can tweet me @jasonfitz with your bucket fillers and even get some awesome swag. Here’s to another week of chaos, my friends.

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Dodgers’ Snell to pause throwing after discomfort

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Dodgers' Snell to pause throwing after discomfort

CHICAGO — Los Angeles Dodgers starter Blake Snell will back off his throwing program as he continues to recover from left shoulder inflammation, according to manager Dave Roberts.

“As he was playing catch, he just didn’t feel great,” Roberts said Wednesday afternoon before the Dodgers played the Chicago Cubs. “Right now, we’re going to slow play the throwing. Will probably get it looked at again when we get back home.”

Snell, 32, has been on the injured list since early April after making just two starts for the Dodgers. He signed a five-year, $182 million contract this past offseason.

Snell, who was set to throw a bullpen session Wednesday, felt discomfort in the shoulder while playing catch Tuesday. Roberts was asked how concerning the latest setback was.

“I wouldn’t say concerning because part of the messaging from us to Blake is, it’s about later on in the season and if there’s any type of discomfort, let’s not try to fight through it,” Roberts responded.

Snell is one of several Dodgers pitchers on the mend, including left-hander Clayton Kershaw, who pitched three innings in a minor league start Tuesday, his second rehab outing this spring.

“Velocity was good,” Roberts said. “Got into the fourth inning. He’ll make a start next week. Really positive stuff.”

The Dodgers also received positive news about right-hander Tyler Glasnow after he left his last start with leg cramps. His latest bullpen session went well, according to Roberts.

Meanwhile, Shohei Ohtani is throwing again after missing time on the paternity list. He’ll have another bullpen session Saturday as he recovers from elbow surgery, though the team still doesn’t have a timetable for his return to major league action.

The team was also without catcher Will Smith on Wednesday after he injured his wrist on a play at the plate in Tuesday’s loss to the Cubs.

“As he made the tag, his [left] wrist turned in and so there’s some residual soreness,” Roberts said.

Smith could get imaging done when the team returns to Los Angeles, but Roberts wasn’t overly concerned about the injury.

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Crow-Armstrong stays hot vs. hometown Dodgers

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Crow-Armstrong stays hot vs. hometown Dodgers

CHICAGO — Most players are happy to be done facing the Los Angeles Dodgers, but Chicago Cubs center fielder Pete Crow-Armstrong might not be one of them.

The Los Angeles native has torched his childhood team this season, including Wednesday night at Wrigley Field when he went 3-for-4 with a home run, two stolen bases and a career-high four RBIs, helping the Cubs to a 7-6 win. It came one night after Chicago beat L.A. 11-10, with Crow-Armstrong contributing another home run.

He was asked Wednesday whether his production has special meaning coming against the team he used to root for.

“Absolutely,” he said. “I mean, they are regarded as the best, and I think we’ve enjoyed being able to show that we’re right there with them, and yeah, it’s always a little extra special for me getting to do it against the team I grew up going to see.”

Crow-Armstrong erased a 2-0 Cubs deficit with an opposite-field, three-run homer in the fourth inning, then added a run-scoring single an inning later, which turned out to be the final run of the night for the Cubs.

Overall, he had four home runs and nine RBIs in the seven-game season series against the Dodgers, which the Cubs won 4-3 after losing the first two games in Japan in mid-March. But that was before the Cubs’ offense took off. They’re averaging an MLB-high 6.3 runs per game.

Crow-Armstrong’s season took off as well, starting over a week ago when the teams met in Los Angeles. In the 10 games since, the 23-year-old is hitting .400 with five home runs.

“He needs to send me a bottle of wine or some golf balls with all the success he’s had,” Dodgers manager Dave Roberts quipped before Wednesday’s game.

Roberts and Crow-Armstrong exchanged pleasantries before the first game of the series, as the second-year player is friends with Roberts’ son, Cole. The two played against each other growing up.

“I got a couple different connections to Doc,” Crow-Armstrong said. “He’s so great.”

That’s the same word Crow-Armstrong’s teammates are using about him as he continues to impress both at the plate and in the field. According to ESPN Research, he’s the fastest player in Cubs history to reach five home runs and 10 stolen bases, doing it in 26 games.

Plus, his pitchers love seeing him patrol center field.

“Defensively, I got to say he’s probably the best,” Wednesday’s starter, Matthew Boyd, said. “And what he’s doing at the plate is no surprise.”

Crow-Armstrong showed signs of breaking out late last year but then struggled early this season before locking in during the Cubs’ most recent road trip. He said he got “on-time” with his swing while learning how to deal with failure better. He was asked how satisfied he is with his game right now.

“If it comes out in a win, it’s very satisfactory,” he said. “It makes me feel very content. I love being able to impact it in any way I can.”

So does his manager, who called Wednesday a “wonderful game” for Crow-Armstrong.

“He made his presence felt in a big way for sure,” Craig Counsell said.

Crow-Armstrong is quickly becoming a fan favorite, as the Cubs faithful are taking to his aggressive style of play. He was asked what it’s like to hear his name chanted when he comes to the plate after producing in previous at-bats.

“I’ve tried to tune that out,” he said with a laugh. “I was actually thinking about it yesterday and I was like, I got to be 0-for-20 when they’ve chanted my name. But they continue to chant and they get behind every one of us and it’s the coolest thing.”

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Rangers’ Seager goes on IL with hamstring strain

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Rangers' Seager goes on IL with hamstring strain

WEST SACRAMENTO, Calif. — The Texas Rangers placed shortstop Corey Seager on the 10-day injured list Wednesday because of a strained right hamstring.

Seager, 30, pulled up while running to first base in the sixth inning Tuesday at the Athletics and left the game. He started 21 of Texas’ first 23 games this season and is hitting .286 with four home runs and six RBIs. Seager has a team-high 17 hits since April 8.

The Rangers also called up infielder Nick Ahmed and designated left-handed pitcher Walter Pennington for assignment. Ahmed, 35, is seeking to appear in a major league game for the 12th consecutive season. He has played for Arizona (2014-23), San Francisco (2024), the Los Angeles Dodgers (2024) and San Diego (2024).

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