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Inspirational thought of the week:

Maybe someday
I’ll be more together
Stretched by fewer thoughts that leave me
Chasing after my dreams, disown me, loaded with danger
So maybe I’ll win …
Saved by zero
Maybe I’ll win …
Saved by zero

— “Saved by Zero,” The Fixx

Here at Bottom 10 Headquarters, located behind the Pixar character rental office where they loaned out that red Anger face from “Inside Out” that Nick Saban borrowed for the AlabamaTennessee game, we are wondering what the heck happened to our numerical BFF. You know, our old pal zero? Cero? Nula? Zewo?

When the final buzzer blared over the last late-night games on Saturday night/Sunday morning and the cigar smoke from Knoxville had finally cleared, we realized that … wait … could it be true?! We’re not even into November yet and there are now no zero-win teams remaining? Nil. Nada. Zilch. It’s the truth, thanks to Colorado’s overtime win over Cal.

It’s weird, right? I mean, sure, we’re used to seeing plenty of 0’s on scoreboards when the clock reads 00:00. We’re accustomed to knowing that zero of our teams will receive bowl berths. We’re plenty familiar with the feeling of knowing the answer when someone asks, “Hey, how many votes did your teams receive in the preseason media polls?” or “How many Bottom 10 teams are playing in prime time on ABC this weekend?” Scratch. Goose egg. Diddly squat.

But then, just as we have given up hope when it comes to ever seeing another zero sum in front of the hyphen and all those losses, a hero rises. A new No. 1 Bottom 10 team. And though it may no longer have a “0-” at the front of its record, its very name steps in to fill the sudden volumeless void.

The Zips.

With apologies to George Plimpton, Damian Lillard and Steve Harvey, here’s the post-Week 7 Bottom 10 rankings.

1. Akronmonious (1-5)

And there was one, as in one remaining #MACtion team with one win. Just three weeks ago, most of the conference fit that description. And then the Zips played Not Eastern Or Western But Central Michigan in the Pillow Fight of the Week Episode VI: The MACtion Menace. And then they were tied with 2:01 to go, with the ball and driving. And then this happened.

2. UMess (1-6)

The Minutemen got Buffaloed by the Bulls Not Bills 34-7 and now face the Fightin’ Byes of Open Date U., who have been installed as a six-touchdown favorite.

3. North by Northworstern (1-5)

Speaking of off weeks, the Mildcats spent theirs licking their post-Wisconsin wounds while Wisconsin spent its weekend making Northwestern’s 42-7 loss to the coachless Badgers even Northworstern as they lost to then-2-4 Bottom 10 Wait Listers Michigan State in double overtime. Now NU travels east for the kind of classic regional rivalry that is quickly becoming the trademark of the Big Ten, a visit to Maryland.

4. Nevada Oof Pack (2-5)

Wait, where did these guys come from? They weren’t even on the Waiting List two weeks ago, but now they jump/fall all the way to No. 4. How? A Week 6 loss to then-No. 1 Colorado State, followed by a Week 7 defeat at the hands of then-No. 2 Hawai’i. It’s the worst week for Nevadans since the government triggered a bunch of atomic bombs outside of Las Vegas and sold it as a tourist attraction. This time the mushroom cloud is coming from Reno.

5. Kansas Nayhawks (5-2)

As my dad told us when Santa brought us a huge new Death Star toy and we immediately blew it up with firecrackers, “You can’t have nice things!” The latest example: Kansas, which went 5-0, was ranked 19th in that other poll and hosted College GameDay … then went and lost two in a row. If we’re being honest, perhaps the Nayhawks are back here simply because we missed them. An itch we couldn’t scratch. A spot of rash that can only be smoothed by slathering of the ointment that is the Coveted Fifth Spot.

6. FI(not A)U (2-4)

The second-worst team named Panthers (behind the NFLers from Carolina) have run a Bottom 10 gauntlet — and by gauntlet we mean a rubber kitchen glove — with a win over Whew Mexico State but a 21-point loss to UCan’t. We don’t really know who they are, but will when they travel north to the home of those other Panthers for the Pillow Fight of the Week against …

7. Charlotte 1-and-6ers (1-6)

Remember way back to Week 4 when Charlotte beat Georgia State Not Southern? Since then, the 1-and-6ers haven’t won again, but Georgia State beat Georgia Southern, which beat Nebraska and just beat No. 25 James Madison, which beat Appalachian State, which beat then-No. 6 Texas A&M, which beat then-No. 10 Arkansas, which just beat BYU, which beat Stanford, which was on the Bottom 10 Waiting List last week but is there no longer because it just beat Notre Dame, which lost to Cal, which just lost to Colorado, which was the top/bottom-ranked Bottom 10 team. This is like that movie “Inception,” but if Leo DiCaprio had spent the entire movie slipping on banana peels.

8. US(notC)F (1-6)

The Bulls have mostly hovered around this list all season because if one watches them closely enough, they know that this team has been competitive in a lot of games against much more talented teams. But when you get into the second half of October and you are one of only seven FBS teams with one win, then you become like Glenn Close in “Fatal Attraction,” screaming from the pirate ship at Raymond James Stadium, “I won’t be IGNORED, DAN!” Dan being me, wondering where my rabbit went.

9. Colora-duh State (1-5)

The Rams made a statement in Week 6 when they defeated No-vada for their first win of the season. Then they made a follow-up statement by losing to Utah State, which had its third-string quarterback under center. The Rams game this weekend against Hawai’i was going to be a candidate for Pillow Fight of the Week of the Year of the Century, but then the Rainbow Warriors beat Nevada too. Why do you hate us, Nevada?

10. Whew Mexico (2-5)

Speaking of teams which keep tossing our worst-laid plans in the shredder, Whew Mexico State was looking at an epic Bottom 10 autumn with a Halloween visit to UMess and a pre-Turkey Day wobble to 2-4 Mizz-lose. But then it went and won the Battle of I-25 against Whew Mexico, now renamed the Battle of I-2-and-5.

Waiting List: Colora-duh, Whew Mexico State, ULM (pronounced “Uhlm”), Temple of Doom, Living on Tulsa Time, Huh-why-yuh, Arkan-saw State, Mizz-lose, Western not Eastern or Central Michigan, Lose-iana Tech, pretty much every team in Virginia, throwing the most awesome post-win souvenir into a river.

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Rule changes let Castroneves enter Daytona 500

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Rule changes let Castroneves enter Daytona 500

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Four-time Indianapolis 500 winner Helio Castroneves claimed a spot in the season-opening Daytona 500 as part of a slew of rule changes NASCAR announced Friday.

Castroneves is guaranteed a spot in the field under a new provision that earmarks a starting position for what NASCAR called “world-class drivers” who enter a Cup Series race. Before the Friday change, Castroneves was going to either have to earn his spot in the 40-car field on speed in time trials or finishing position in a qualifying race.

If he failed to do either, the Brazilian would be in the field as a 41st car and four open spots would still remain for drivers hoping to race in the Feb. 16 “Great American Race.” Castroneves will be driving for Trackhouse Racing in his NASCAR debut at age 49.

Under the new rule, if the provisional is used, the driver/car owner will not be eligible for race points, playoff points or prize money. Cars that finish below the driver who uses the provisional will have their finishing position adjusted upward one spot and also have their prize money, race points and stage points adjusted.

If the provisional car wins a race and/or stage, that car will be credited with the race win. It will not count toward playoff eligibility. The second-place finisher will inherit first-place points, but will not receive playoff points or playoff eligibility.

Among other changes issued Friday:

Playoff waivers: NASCAR said if a driver misses a race for anything besides a medical emergency, the driver will forfeit all current and future playoff points and will start the playoffs with a maximum of 2,000 points.

Covered under medical emergency would be emergencies for the driver, the birth of a child or a family emergency, as well as age restrictions.

It means that Kyle Larson, who is scheduled to again race in both the Indianapolis 500 and the Coca-Cola 600 for a second consecutive year, must return from Indiana to North Carolina and compete in the Cup race. It was a point of contention last year when rain delayed the 500 in Indy, Larson was late to arrive in North Carolina for the 600, and by the time he got to the track, rain had stopped that race.

Larson never got to compete in the Coca-Cola 600, and NASCAR hemmed and hawed for a lengthy amount of time before finally granting him a waiver.

Waivers previously came with no penalties such as the loss of playoff points.

Penalties to manufacturers: After the penultimate race at Martinsville Speedway was marred last year by allegations of manufacturers banding together to push their drivers into the championship race, NASCAR vowed to look at how it can stop such manipulation in the future.

NASCAR said that, moving forward, violations by manufacturers may result in the loss of manufacturers points, and/or loss of wind tunnel hours. NASCAR will assess such penalties for violation of the vehicle testing policy, wind tunnel policy, event roster and code of conduct.

Performance obligation: NASCAR did not give many details on this change other than “verbiage around the 100% rule is replaced with a focus on ‘manipulating’ the outcome of an event/championship.”

Practice and qualifying: New practice and qualifying procedures were formally added to the rulebook. Group practice goes from 20 to 25 minutes; single-round qualifying at all tracks but superspeedways, which will have a final round for 10 cars; and starting position is determined solely by qualifying results instead of row-by-row designation based on which qualifying group the car was in.

Suspension deferral: NASCAR said all suspensions that are a result of a technical penalty can be deferred without appeal for the next race following a penalty. All other suspensions are effective immediately.

Damaged vehicle policy: NASCAR has altered this policy for the Cup Series after many complaints about how the rule was applied last year.

Vehicles on the DVP clock may drive to the garage or be towed to the garage and will not be ruled out of the race. Previously, if a car on the DVP clock was towed to the garage or drove to the garage, it was out of the race.

Information from The Associated Press was used in this report.

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Effort to unionize college athletes hits road block

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Effort to unionize college athletes hits road block

The legal efforts to unionize college athletes appear to be running out of steam this month as a new Republican-led administration gets set to take over the federal agency in charge of ruling on employment cases.

A players’ advocacy group who filed charges against the NCAA, Pac-12 and USC that would have potentially opened the door for college players to form a union decided Friday to withdraw its complaint. Their case – which was first filed in February 2022 – was one of two battles against the NCAA taken up by the National Labor Relations Board in recent years. Earlier this week, an administrative law judge closed the other case, which was filed by men’s basketball players at Dartmouth.

The National College Players Association, which filed its complaint on behalf of USC athletes, said the recent changes in state law and NCAA rules that are on track to allow schools to directly pay their players starting this summer caused them to reconsider their complaint.

“[T]he NCPA believes that it is best to provide adequate time for the college sports industry to transition into this new era before football and basketball players employee status is ruled upon,” the organization’s founder Ramogi Huma wrote in the motion to withdraw.

The NCAA and its four power conferences agreed to the terms of a legal settlement this summer that will allow schools to spend up to roughly $20.5 million on direct payments to their athletes starting next academic year. The deal is scheduled to be finalized in April.

College sports leaders, including NCAA President Charlie Baker, have remained steadfast in their belief that athletes should not be considered employees of their schools during a period when college sports have moved closer to a professionalized model.

Some industry stakeholders believe that the richest schools in college sports will need to collectively bargain with athletes to put an end to the current onslaught of legal challenges facing the industry. Currently, any collective bargaining would have to happen with a formal union to provide sufficient legal protection. Some members of Congress say they are discussing the possibility of creating a special status for college sports that would allow collective bargaining without employment. However, Congressional aides familiar with ongoing negotiations told ESPN that influential Republican leaders in Congress are firmly against the idea.

The NLRB’s national board previously declined to make a ruling on whether college athletes should be employees in 2015 when a group of football players at Northwestern attempted to unionize. Jennifer Abruzzo, the agency’s leader during the Biden administration, signaled an interest in taking up the athletes’ fight to unionize early in her tenure. Abruzzo is not expected to remain as the NLRB’s general counsel during Donald Trump’s presidency.

Under Abruzzo, the agency’s regional offices pushed both the Dartmouth and USC cases forward in the past year. Dartmouth players got far enough to vote in favor of forming a union in March 2024, but were still in the appeals process when they decided to end their effort last month.

The only remaining legal fight over employee status in college sports is a federal lawsuit known as Johnson v. NCAA. That case claims the association is violating the Fair Labor Standards Act, which does not guarantee the right to unionize but instead would give athletes some basic employee rights such as minimum wage and overtime pay. That case is currently working its way through the legal process in the Third Circuit federal court.

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LSU’s Lacy facing charges related to fatal crash

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LSU's Lacy facing charges related to fatal crash

Louisiana State Police have issued an arrest warrant for former LSU receiver Kyren Lacy, who is accused of causing a fatal crash that killed a 78-year-old man on Dec. 17 and then fleeing the scene without rendering aid or calling authorities.

Louisiana State Police said on Friday that Lacy will be charged with negligent homicide, felony hit-and-run and reckless operation of a vehicle.

Police said they have been in contact with Lacy and his attorney to turn himself in.

According to a news release from state police, Lacy was allegedly driving a 2023 Dodge Charger on Louisiana Highway 20 and “recklessly passed multiple vehicles at a high rate of speed by crossing the centerline and entering the northbound lane while in a designated no-passing zone.”

“As Lacy was illegally passing the other vehicles, the driver of a northbound pickup truck abruptly braked and swerved to the right to avoid a head-on collision with the approaching Dodge,” a Louisiana State Police news release said.

“Traveling behind the pickup was a 2017 Kia Cadenza whose driver swerved left to avoid the oncoming Dodge Charger. As the Kia Cadenza took evasive action to avoid impact with the Dodge, it crossed the centerline and collided head-on with a southbound 2017 Kia Sorento.”

Police alleged that Lacy, 24, drove around the crash scene and fled “without stopping to render aid, call emergency services, or report his involvement in the crash.”

Herman Hall, 78, of Thibodaux, Louisiana, who was a passenger in the Kia Sorrento, later died from injuries suffered in the crash, according to state police.

The drivers of the Cadenza and Sorento also sustained moderate injuries, according to police.

Lacy played two seasons at Louisiana before transferring to LSU in 2022. This past season, he had 58 catches for 866 yards with nine touchdowns and declared for the NFL draft on Dec. 19, two days after the crash.

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