Connect with us

Published

on

Inspirational thought of the week:

Now the race is on
And here comes pride up the backstretch
Heartache’s going to the inside
My tears are holding back
They’re trying not to fall
My heart’s out of the running
True love’s scratched for another’s sake
The race is on, and it looks like heartaches
And the winner loses all
– “The Race is On” by George Jones

Here at Bottom 10 Headquarters, located in same room as the computer server that houses all the drafts of Lane Kiffin’s reserve supply of clapback tweets, we are up on the wheel with a lead foot in the throttle like Ross Chastain at Martinsville Speedway. There’s only one lap remaining in the race that is the 2022 college football regular season, and the white flag is out.

For those of you who don’t follow NASCAR, we must explain that the white flag doesn’t mean surrender, it means the end of the race is imminent and the next flag shown will be the checkers. In other words, there’s one week left before we declare a champion. But this also isn’t the Valleydale Meats 500, is it? It’s the Bottom 10. And in this world, everything is a surrender flag, no matter how hard any man — even a 12th man — might try to disguise it as something else.

With apologies to Cornelius Tacitus, E. King Gill, former Tennessee State defensive end Joe “Turkey” Jones and Steve Harvey, here are the post-Week 12, pre-Thanksgiving Bottom 10 rankings.


1. UMess (1-10)

The Minutemen lost their second consecutive Pillow Fight of the Week, following up the heartbreak of their near win at Arkansas State with a solid showing in front of tens of fans at Kyle Field, losing to Texas A&M 20-3 after trailing by only 10 points for most of the second half. This despite at least two of their players spending the entire game unable to hear anything because the Corps of Cadets decided to reenact the Battle of Lexington and Concord during the pregame.

2. Colora-duh (1-10)

Speaking of the American Revolution, Washington was victorious against the Buffaloes, a win iced by a fourth-quarter TD catch that was hauled in, of course, by a receiver named Sam Adams II.

3. Akronmonious (1-9)

Speaking of Buffaloes, Akron was supposed to have played the Buffalo Bulls Not Bills, but apparently Elsa of Arendelle is either a Zips alum or has some money down on the Bottom 10 title race, because someone dumped 77 inches of snow on the city over the weekend and postponed the game indefinitely.

4. US(not C)F (1-10)

Speaking of Bulls and inclement weather, USF lost a 48-42 track meet to the Tulsa Golden Hurricane. It was just a warm-up for this week’s annual Thanksgiving weekend hyperactive rivalry matchup with UC(not S)F, aka the War on I-4. I’m not entirely sure that the Black Friday 2017 edition of this game ever actually ended, just as I am not entirely sure that anyone ever actually gets off I-4 once they get on it.

5. Good Ol’ Rocky Slop (Whew!) (9-2)

After the attack on Pearl Harbor, stunt pilot-turned-Air Force general Jimmy Doolittle trained his legendary Raiders for their bombing attack on Tokyo just outside of Columbia, South Carolina, not far from the Williams-Brice Stadium, home of the South Carolina Gamecocks. The fleet of B-25s would bomb the same piece of earth over and over and over and over again, refuel, and then bomb it again and again and again and again, day after day after day. On Saturday night in Columbia, with USC up 63-38, the ghost of Doolittle was heard saying, “Damn, Cocks, that’s enough.”

6. North by Northworstern (1-10)

Northwestern of now feels like the Northwestern of the 1980s as it rides the nation’s longest losing streak, a slump that has reached nine losses. According to the magically and creepily accurate ESPN FPI computers, there is an 81.7% chance that the Artists Formerly Known as Ill-ugh-noise will extend that streak to 10. If that happens, the Mildcats will be throwing a formidable résumé onto the table of the Bottom 10 Selection Committee next week. And seeing as how that table is actually just an old TV tray we found at a trailer park “estate auction,” there’s going to be quite the moment when it collapses and spills Natty Light all over the lap of committee chairman Charlie Weis.

7. Whew Mexico No-bos (2-9)

The Mountain West’s Bottom 10 incursion brings to mind the words of Lando Calrissian at the Battle of Endor when he asked, “I wonder what those Star Destroyers are waiting for?” Only instead of giant, weapons-laden spaceships, it’s a fleet of recycled Trailways buses. The No-bos have crashed this party via eight straight losses, and a season-ending tenth defeat at the hands of Bottom 10 Waiting Listers Colora-duh State could be what Whew Mexico needs to stage its own version of the Holdo Maneuver.

8. No-vada (2-9)

Meanwhile, the Oof Pack has also dropped nine straight, having already gotten their Colorado State loss out of the way back in Week 5. Now, suddenly, we have a Pillow Fight of the Week of the Year of the Century coming that was on no one’s radar just a few scant weeks ago, but now might be the game with the biggest impact on the final Bottom 10 standings. Against who? Or whom? Or whomever? Or whatever my English teacher would tell me to write here but I am too excited to recall correct grammar?

9. unLv (4-7)

These guys! Our old friends from Earth’s largest Roomba are in these rankings for the first time this season. Is it unusual for a four-win team to be here this late in the season? Yep. But that’s what happens when you slide into the end of that season like me when I lived in Connecticut, thinking I could drive my Pontiac Grand Am on ice. The Other Rebels’ losing streak just reached six thanks to a 31-25 loss at season-long Bottom 10 stalwart Huh-why-yuh.

10. Agricultural and Mechanical College of Texas (4-7)

Okay, first off, you don’t get out of the Bottom 10 after barely beating the top/bottom team at home, even if you were only in the Coveted Fifth Spot, and especially when you started the fall in the preseason Top 10. Secondly, you totally are docked lack-of-style points when you fire a cannon at a couple of dudes praying in the pregame and also that shirtless towel relay thing. And finally, did I do this just to get a rise out of people in College Station because it’s Thanksgiving and angry SEC fans in my inbox are just as delicious as dressing with gravy and those baked marshmallows scraped off the top of the sweet potato pie and eaten all on their own like candy? You can’t see me right now, but I am responding with a “Gig ’em” thumbs up. And yes, that’s a baked marshmallow on the end of my thumb.

Waiting List: Arkansaw State, Colora-duh State, Huh-why-yuh, Lose-ee-anna Tech, Charlotte 3-and-9ers, Old Duh-minions, Northern Ill-ugh-noise, Stampford, In A Rut-gers, No-braska, Temple of Doom, your drunk uncle taking the turkey leg and eating it in front of your face while talking politics.

Continue Reading

Sports

NASCAR asks judge to dismiss antitrust lawsuit

Published

on

By

NASCAR asks judge to dismiss antitrust lawsuit

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — NASCAR went before a federal judge Wednesday and asked for the antitrust suit filed against the stock car series to be dismissed. Should it proceed, NASCAR asked that the two teams suing be ordered to post a bond to cover fees they would not be legally owed if they lose the case.

NASCAR also asked U.S. District Judge Kenneth Bell of the Western District of North Carolina to dismiss chairman Jim France as a defendant in the suit filed by 23XI Racing, a team co-owned by NBA Hall of Famer Michael Jordan, and Front Row Motorsports, which is owned by entrepreneur Bob Jenkins.

Bell promised a fast ruling but indicated he was unlikely to dismiss the suit when he closed the 90-minute hearing. The calendar he set when he received the case last month calls for a December trial.

“This case is going to be tried this year, and deserves to be tried this year,” Bell said.

Bell replaced Judge Frank Whitney, who heard the first round of arguments in early November. The teams went before Whitney and asked to be recognized as chartered teams this year as the suit progresses, but Whitney denied the motion.

The teams appealed and the case was transferred to Bell, who overruled Whitney and granted an injunction that allow 23XI and Front Row to compete with charter recognition throughout the 2025 season. That led NASCAR to request the teams post a bond to cover all the payouts they will receive as chartered teams as collateral should the teams lose the case.

NASCAR and the teams that compete in the top Cup Series operate with a franchise system that was implemented in 2016 in which 36 cars have “charters” that guarantee them a spot in the field at every race and financial incentives. There are four “open” spots earmarked for the field each week.

The teams banded together in negotiations on an improved charter system in a contentious battle with NASCAR for nearly two years. NASCAR in September finally had enough and presented the teams with a take-it-or-leave-it offer that had to be signed same day — just 48 hours before the start of the playoffs.

23XI and Front Row were the only two teams out of 15 who refused to sign the new charter agreement. They then teamed together to sue NASCAR and France, arguing as the only stock car entity in the United States, NASCAR has a monopoly and the teams are not getting their fair share of the pie.

Both organizations maintained they would still compete as open cars, but convinced Bell last month to give them chartered status by arguing they would suffer irreparable harm as open cars. Among the claims was that 23XI driver Tyler Reddick, last year’s regular season champion, would contractually become an immediate free agent if the team did not have him in a guaranteed chartered car.

Bell peppered both sides with questions regarding payout structures, what harm NASCAR would suffer if the teams were open cars and other issues.

“Why give a charter to anyone?” he at one point asked NASCAR.

Replied NASCAR attorney Christopher Yates, of Latham & Watkins: “NASCAR would be perfectly fine going back to that (pre-charter) model.”

Bell admitted he doesn’t normally hear motions to dismiss but did Wednesday because “we’ve got to get this case moving.” He later said he felt the hearing was beneficial as he was able to “size up” the attorneys and they could do the same with him.

Bell also warned both sides to work together to avoid disputes and promised the losing side will pay the fees for the discovery portion of the case.

With all indications that Bell is not going to dismiss the suit, it appears the only suspense will be if he orders the teams to post bond before the season begins next month. NASCAR argued Wednesday that it needs that money earmarked because it would be redistributed to the chartered teams if 23XI and Front Row lose.

Jeffery Kessler, considered the top antitrust lawyer in the country, argued that NASCAR has made no such promise to redistribute the funds to other teams. Kessler said NASCAR told teams it was up to NASCAR’s discretion how it would use the money and didn’t rule out spending some on its own legal fees.

Jordan and Jenkins attended the first hearing but were not present Wednesday. Only 23XI co-owner Denny Hamlin was present, along with his fiancee and mother. France and vice chairman Mike Helton were in the gallery with NASCAR’s in-house legal counsel and members of the communications team.

Continue Reading

Sports

Portal QB Van Dyke picks SMU for his third stop

Published

on

By

Portal QB Van Dyke picks SMU for his third stop

Former Wisconsin/Miami quarterback Tyler Van Dyke has committed to SMU, agent Shawn O’Dare of Rosenhaus Sports announced Wednesday.

The fifth-year quarterback entered the transfer portal after appearing in three games this fall during his debut season with the Badgers before sustaining a season-ending injury against Alabama on Sept. 14.

Van Dyke, a three-year starter at Miami from 2021 to 2023, has 7,891 career passing yards and 55 career touchdown passes and has one year of eligibility remaining. He was ranked by ESPN as the 25th best quarterback in the transfer portal.

With 33 career games played, the 6-foot-4, 225-pound passer was one of the most experienced quarterbacks available in the 2024 portal cycle.

Benched in his final season at Miami in 2023, Van Dyke arrived at Wisconsin last offseason and was named the Badgers’ starting quarterback on Aug. 14 after a camp competition with sophomore Braden Locke. Van Dyke completed 43 of 68 passes for 422 yards and a touchdown in three starts to open the 2024 season, but he was sidelined for the rest of the season after sustaining a knee injury on the opening drive of Wisconsin’s 42-10 loss to Alabama in Week 3.

The 2025 season will mark Van Dyke’s sixth in college football. He first burst onto the scene at Miami in 2021, taking over for injured D’Eriq King and throwing for 2,931 yards with 25 touchdowns and six interceptions on his way to ACC Rookie of the Year honors.

But Van Dyke’s next two seasons with the Hurricanes were marred by injury and turnover struggles, headlined by a 2023 campaign in which Van Dyke threw a career-high 12 interceptions and was benched in favor of backup Emory Williams before regaining the starting role after Williams sustained a season-ending injury.

ESPN’s Eli Lederman contributed to this report.

Continue Reading

Sports

Franklin jabs at ND, says CFP needs uniformity

Published

on

By

Franklin jabs at ND, says CFP needs uniformity

DANIA BEACH, Fla. — While discussing the opportunity that awaits Penn State in the College Football Playoff, coach James Franklin said Wednesday that the showdown against Notre Dame is about “representing our schools and our conferences.”

Franklin then caught himself, realizing Notre Dame coach Marcus Freeman was sitting just to his right.

“Or our conference, excuse me,” Franklin said.

Penn State will be representing the Big Ten against FBS independent Notre Dame in the College Football Playoff Semifinal at the Capital One Orange Bowl on Thursday night (7:30 p.m. ET, ESPN) at Hard Rock Stadium.

The Nittany Lions reached the Big Ten championship game before earning a No. 6 seed in the first 12-team CFP, while the Fighting Irish made the playoff as an at-large and earned the No. 7 seed despite playing in one fewer game.

Franklin said he thinks a larger CFP ultimately requires more uniformity around college football, including every team to be part of a conference and playing the same number of league games. Notre Dame, one of three remaining FBS independents, sees its status as central to the school’s identity and has resisted chances to join the Big Ten and other conferences over the years. The Fighting Irish compete in the ACC for most of their other major sports, and they have a scheduling agreement with the ACC in football.

“It should be consistent across college football,” Franklin said. “This is no knock at [Freeman] or Notre Dame, but I think everybody should be in a conference. I think everybody should play a conference championship game, or nobody should play a conference champion championship game. I think everybody should play the same number of conference games.”

Penn State reached the CFP by playing nine conference games as well as the Big Ten championship game against No. 1 Oregon, which defeated the Nittany Lions 45-37 on Dec. 7. The Big 12 also has maintained a nine-game league slate, while the SEC and ACC have stayed at eight conference games.

Franklin, who coached at Vanderbilt before Penn State, praised the SEC for remaining at eight league games, which the league’s coaches wanted. The SEC has repeatedly considered going to nine league games during Franklin’s time in the Big Ten.

“I was not a math major at East Stroudsburg, but just the numbers are going to make things more challenging if you’re playing one more conference game,” he said.

Franklin also highlighted other areas of the sport that could be made more uniform, including starting the season a week earlier to ease the strain of playing more games with an expanded playoff. He reiterated his desire to appoint a college football commissioner unaffiliated with a school or a conference, and once again mentioned longtime coach and current ESPN analyst Nick Saban as an option, along with former Washington and Boise State coach Chris Petersen, now a Fox college football analyst, and Dave Clawson, who recently stepped down as Wake Forest’s coach.

“We need somebody that is looking at it from a big-picture perspective,” Franklin said.

Freeman acknowledged that Notre Dame prides itself on its independence. He said the team uses the weekend of conference championships, when they’re guaranteed not to be playing, as another open week for recovery and other priorities.

Notre Dame ended the regular season Nov. 30 and did not play again until Dec. 20, when it hosted Indiana in a first-round CFP game. In helping craft the format for the 12-team CFP, former Notre Dame athletic director Jack Swarbrick agreed that if the Irish were selected, they would not be eligible to earn a bye into the quarterfinals.

Freeman noted that he doesn’t have a strong opinion on whether college football needs more uniformity.

“I’m a guy that just [thinks], ‘Tell us what we’re doing and let’s go, and you move forward,'” Freeman said. “I love where we’re at right now. [Athletic director] Pete Bevacqua and our Notre Dame administration will continue to make decisions that are best for our program.”

Franklin said his desire for greater consistency stems from the CFP selection process and the difficulty of committee members to sort through teams with vastly different paths and profiles, and determine strength of schedule and other factors.

“How do you put those people that are in that room to make a really important decision that impacts the landscape of college football, and they can’t compare apples to apples or oranges to oranges?” Franklin said. “I think that makes it very, very difficult.”

Continue Reading

Trending