Inspirational thought of the week:

We’ve been through this such a long, long time
Just tryin’ to kill the pain, ooh, yeah
But lovers always come and lovers always go
And no one’s really sure who’s lettin’ it go today, walkin’ away
If we could take the time to lay it on the line
I could rest my head just knowin’ that you were mine, all mine

Nothin’ lasts forever
And we both know hearts can change
And it’s hard to hold a candle
In the cold November rain

— “November Rain,” Guns N’ Roses

Here at Bottom 10 Headquarters, located in the very empty wardrobe box labeled “Shirts For Pat McAfee To Wear For His Last Game Pick,” we love college football most of all for its dedication to traditions.

Like Alabama fans bellowing “Dixieland Delight” and pretending that the song isn’t actually about Tennessee. Or a season of Auburn football penning more drama than a season of “General Hospital.” Or people stopping me at the airport to explain why Lane Kiffin is going to totally quit Ole Miss to take the job at their alma mater. Or Sprit Halloween tweets always being funny … unless you’re a Clemson fan.

“Death” Valley pic.twitter.com/77Q4LRXj6v

— Duke Football (@DukeFOOTBALL) November 1, 2025

And, of course, the greatest, most unstoppable, inevitably occurring college football tradition of them all. No, not me jinxing another QB by doing a “College GameDay” feature on him. (My bad, Brendan Sorsby!) But rather, me being so tired and cranky entering Week 11 that as soon as I realize what month it is I just lazily and automatically fill the Inspirational Thought of the Week with the lyrics to “November Rain.”

With apologies to Cincy D-lineman Elijah Gunn, Navy safety Aaron Rose, Wyoming defensive end Axel Ramazani, Kordell “Slash” Stewart and Steve Harvey, here’s the post-Week 10 Bottom 10 rankings.

The Minuetmen sat out last weekend for two reasons. First, they were resting up for their #MACtion Tuesday night trip to the Artist Formerly Known As Akronmonious, which turned out to be a 44-10 loss. Second, the Commonwealth asked them to schedule a bye because, and I quote, “Between the Salem Witch Trials, pumpkin lagers and the Celtics from 3-point range, Halloween around here is already scary enough.”

For kontinuous weeks on the kalendar we have inkreased the kommotion toward this weekend’s klash with Oregon State. But the Beavers krushed our expektancy bekause they won konsecutive kontests. Kurses!

The Woof Pack also had the weekend off, but somehow still lost by two touchdowns.

Sources have told Bottom 10 JortsCenter that Georgia State, whose stadium was used as the home field for the South Georgia Catfish in the Hulu TV series “Chad Powers” starring Glen Powell, spent its bye week ahead of this weekend’s trip to Coastal Carolina down the street at Atlanta Falcons practice with Powell’s makeup kit trying to convince Michael Penix Jr. to try on rubber noses, wigs and a Georgia State uniform for “a trip to the beach with free concessions.”

In related news, Georgia Tech, located just around the corner from Georgia State, the Falcons and Chad Powers, are investigating if, like Powers, perhaps maybe against NC State someone replaced the entire Yellowjackets defense and secretly subbed in a bunch of old guys in disguise.

The Niners travel Down East to EC-Yew for an American contest. I like that description, American contest. That makes it sound like there will be a bunch of people dressed like Uncle Sam playing cornhole and drinking longnecks while Lee Greenwood sings and bald eagles circle overhead. And if you’ve ever tailgated in Greenville, North Carolina, then you know that there is a 99% chance that you will actually see that.

The good news is that BC’s past two games, both losses, came against ranked opponents. The bad news is that its earlier 41-10 home loss to Clemson is aging about as well as a bottle of truck stop merlot.

This year’s coaching carousel isn’t a carousel at all. It’s that whirling Gravitron ride at the county fair that spins so fast your feet no longer touch the floor and your girlfriend throws up on the stranger next to her. But sometimes a spin cycle is exactly what you need to finally find that matching sock that’s been missing for far too long. Which is a really long way for me to say that the team that calls itself the Pokes should totally hire Hugh Freeze.

Speaking of perfect fits, a reminder that on Week 13 MTSU hosts Sam Houston State. Kickoff time is listed as TBD, which stands for Totally Badass Day.

When the Golden Hurricane beat Oklahoma State back during Week 4, it felt like a much bigger deal than it turned out to be. And when we looked ahead to their Week 12 visit from Oregon State, that felt like a much bigger Bottom 10 deal than it is turning out to be. It’s the college football equivalent to my single dating days, when all those poor girls thought the evening was going to be a much bigger deal than it turned out to be.

Waiting List: UTEPid, Oregon Trail State (You have died of dysentery), Wisconsin Bad-gers, Northern Ill-ugh-noise, EMU Emus, Arkansaw, South Alabama Redundancies, limits on tortilla tosses.